Missing dad

Hi everyone- I’m not feeling well, and things always seem to hurt more. My dad passed at the beginning of last month in hospital from pneumonia and we have just had his funeral, or as my sister and I called it, remembering Dad. He’d not been well for a while, and I’m glad I was able to visit him in has last days, the day he passed I was stuck in a lift in the hospital and he’d gone just before I got onto the ward. It was such a shock. The nursing staff and doctors were brilliant, and was able to spend time with him before they moved him. I just seem to have had so much grief, losing my mum when I was 31, my brother six years later to cancer, and first husband three months after my brother.

Losing Dad has knocked me sideways. From my experience I know things will get better in time, but just needed to let it all out as friends and family although being supportive, don’t understand how I feel. Sorry this is so long! Thank you for reading this x

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Tracy, I am so sorry for you because there seems to be too many special people leaving us.
It must have been devastating to be so close but also far away from your dad. Sometimes it’s the way it is meant to be that you weren’t there at the end but having time after may seem to be right.
It will knock you sideways, grief attacks when we don’t expect. Try to take it slowly and treasure all those great memories of all those special people. Stay safe. S xxx

Dear Tracy, I am really so sorry for your loss, and I feel I understand you. I have lost my soulmate, my very caring, livefully father July30, in hospital, to cancer, but nobody knew it before he died. I wasn’t with him when he died, because the doctor didn’t know, it would be happenning. I feel guilty of it, that I left him alone. In the hospital the doctor was very kind.
I still don’t believe it, that it has happened. I lost my talking mate, soul mate, my father, who always pick up the phone when I rang, and often wait for me with love. But never ever more.
I understand you that other people don’t understand how you feel. I feel this as well. I think people think you have to go on (or pretend it) and smile, and they call this “adult behavior”. But I dont’t think so, you have to do it. I still can’t laugh.

I am here if you want to chat anytime. Sorry for my bad English.

App, thank you for posting and everything you wrote is true and I hope others will join in the thread. Please never apologise for your English because it far superior to any I can do. It’s lovely to have someone on the site from Hungary. Take care and bless you for posting. S xx

Thank you, Suzie, you are very kind and it is very good for me now, when I feel so lonely.