Missing mum

Hi I lost my beautiful mum 10 days ago suddenly with no goodbyes. She wasn’t sick before hand. A brain aneurysm ruptured and caused a massive bleed in her brain. We sat with her for 2 days in icu knowing there was no hope and then machines were switched off and she passed away. I was in complete shock and my body literally shook for a good few days. I couldn’t sleep or eat until a few days ago and now I’m just totally lost without her and miss her so much


Hello @Jude44 ,

I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about your mum. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that might be helpful.

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,


Hi Jude44

I’m sorry to hear about your mum. My mum died exactly the same way 3.5 years ago

It was such a shock and even now I struggle to believe it actually happened. However, for the sake of my partner and daughter, I have got on with life. Working, going out for family meals etc.

The rawness and pain have gone but the void she had left has never lessened.

A sudden bleed on the brain took my mum within hours. I couldn’t even sit with her because I was in such denial.

Thinking of you

Cheryl x


Hi Cheryl

It’s hard to accept. I know my mum would be telling me to stay strong but it’s just so hard without her. I have a husband and 2 little boys and my dad to look after also now. It has been 12 days now since she passed and I think adrenaline had kept me going through the icu and wake etc. I kept busy organising everything for her funeral the way she would have wanted but now I’m really missing her voice and seeing her we were very close and I saw her most days. I’m sure you felt exactly like me with no goodbye or anything just gone forever from your life.

Thank you for thinking on me. Sending love :heart:


Hi Jude

Things will get better. It does take time though.

Having children definitely helps and will keep you going.

It’s such early days and you need to take things an hour at a time.

Cheryl x

Our mums were the same age as well. Mine was 74 and we had a lovely pub lunch just the day before with no sign of what was about to come.

Here if you need to talk x

Hi Cheryl

Thank you so much for your support. It helps to know that you have experienced the same thing. X