Missing my husband

Hello everyone
I just wanted to get this down on paper really.
I know there is nothing anyone can do.
I lost my husband in December last year. I’ve done quite well really, sorting things put & holding things together at home (our children are 18 & 15). Everyone keeps telling me how strong I am.
Anyway I just can’t stop crying when I’m at home and very so very low. I miss him so much.
I hate this horrible feeling.
I accept I will not ‘get over’ him but will this horrible emptiness ease in time. It would have been our 30th wedding anniversary last week so that hasn’t helped
Thank you

Hi Lesley
So sorry you are feeling so low but just to say I know how you feel.
I lost my husband 2 months ago. We have no children and at 58, he was too, it’s devastating. We moved to Cornwall 4 years ago from Birmingham and I now feel so alone. I want to move back to be close to people and to hear sounds. It’s so quiet here. It’s just I haven’t the energy yet. I can’t even go through Carl’s clothes without crying, never mind packing. I just feel like i want my lovely husband here with me. The house is so lonely and I cry every night and a lot during the day. It seems to have got worse over the last 2 weeks. I don’t know whether that’s normal. Carl died suddenly of a heart attack in the gym, so I’ve been in shock so maybe the reality is hitting me hard. I can’t bear the thought that he isn’t coming back. I, like you, miss him so much. I don’t know what we can do to make things a little better, but at least we can support each other. Sending you lots of love xx

Hi everyone, I lost my husband 7 weeks ago today .We had been married for almost 48 years. I hate the feeling of lonliness. I just want to be with him,it’s so painful. I cry all.of the time. I can hold it together with family but when I’m alone I miss him so much. We were best friends and did everything together. He left a huge gap I can never fill. I think of the things we will never do together, even though our life was full. every day. I suppose this is the price we pay for loving someone so much. My only consolation is that he is not suffering anymore. For that I am thankful. I know we have to somehow carry on until its our time to be with them again. Thank goodness for this forum where you know you are talking to people who feel exactly the same.
Take care ,


Hi Sandy
I found this and it eased my pain slightly. I know exactly how you are feeling. My husband died 9 weeks ago. We were married 37 years and like you were devoted to each other. He was my world. My thoughts are with you.

Hi Lin Thank you for sending. me that quote. It’s so true. I am grateful to have had him for all those years. We were so lucky to have found each other early on in our lives. Some people never find that special person. I remind myself also that we will be together again one day. Love

I lost David in November - I can’t believe it’s been 9 months. I thought I was coping, but I realise that I can hardly let myself think about him or I panic- I can’t bear the thought of not seeing him again. We would have been together 33 years. No children, so I feel totally alone. All I can think is I MISS HIM

Hi everyone.
Another lonely night in an empty bed. The cuddles and the warmth is what I miss the most. I think if I knew this was temporary like when he went into hospital, I could cope. But it’s the finality of it that is agonising. I miss him so much its so lonely
Just existing waiting for the day he comes to get me. Sandy

Hi Lesley. I really feel your pain. My husband died 5 weeks ago so I’ve no idea how I’ll feel as time goes on. I decided tonight that I’m going to keep a ‘Dear Jeff’ journal so that I can tell him how I feel, day by day, and what I am doing. I promised him I’d be strong and positive but I don’t know how at the moment. All I can say is that writing down my feelings tonight has helped in some small way.
I really hope that you find a way through this. Take care, Carol x

Yes I started a journal too. I just put in my emotions, treating as a grief diary. I’ve also written a couple of poems. Anything to pour out the sadness. It’ll be worth looking at in a year and seeing if I’m feeling different then. I’m at 9 weeks now. The last 2 weeks have been terrible. My doctor has told me that the grief sometimes forms a trough in our emotional state, leaving us stuck and that’s where depression can start. Just trying to function, not rushing and accepting it’s ok to do whatever you want is ok. Sleep, cry, rest.
It’s the basic things about being with someone that I miss. Holding hands, having a kiss, snuggling up at night, just chatting, eating together and laughing together. Sharing. And I hate shopping for one. I loved cooking for Carl. He loved my food. It’s lonely.
Hugs to everyone.