Missing my mum

My mum died 13 days before my 10th birthday and I miss her so much it’s been 10 years nearly since she passed away and I’m struggling a lot I miss her everyday. My best mate is 40 so she’s 20 years older then me and I look at her as my mum and she’s done lots for me more then a mate should do but I feel alone still as she can’t replace my mum. But I want to get better for my mum and for my best mate as I want to make them both proud I’ve turned a corner and got better with my mental health. As my best mate is my 2nd mum it sounds strange and weird I know but that’s how I feel and she looks after me as one of her own. I feel alone because I don’t know anyone except my family who has gone through something similar as no one truly understands how I feel feeling sad all the time. I want to know if it gets easier and if grief counselling really helps as I had it before but I didn’t really engaged a I wasn’t able to talk freely like I am now. I just really miss my mum she was my best friend and role model she was my hero but my new mum is now. But me and my best mate are talking less everyday so I can get better before we start tlak it normally again I’m trying so hard to get better for her but it’s really hard fighting this lonely battle on my own.

Dear Elizabeth3,

You have taken a brave step by coming to this site and sharing your situation and how you feel. If you have read some of the stories other people have posted, you will have seen that you are not alone. Everyone who comes to this site has lost a loved one, some recently, some like you many years ago.
Grief counseling is available through Sue Ryder and this is something you could consider. As you say, you are older now than when your tried it before.
It must have been very hard for you to lose your mum at such a young age and I totally understand that you are still missing her and always will. Treasure the memories you have of her. I think she would be very proud of you trying so hard to get better and that she would be very happy that you have people in your life who are helping you.

Dear Elizabeth,

I can’t even begin to imagine not having your Mum around before your turned 10 years old,so sorry for your loss. You are very brave indeed. I lost my Mum 4 years ago when i was 34 years old,and i feel too young to not have my Mum around!! It’s good you have a good friend to turn to,but i agree with you it’s just not the same. I have been battling an anxiety disorder for 9 years now,my Mum was the only person who really understood what it was like to suffer with that. I Honestly say i am not the same person anymore,but carry on for the sake of my 14 year old son,my Mum is never far away from my thoughts. This site is helpful,as you are not on your own,many people including myself are just getting through each day,the best they can. I Hope you find peace one day,Lucy,xxx

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I’m sorry for your lost too and thank you for your kind words I hope you continue doing well and keep looking after yourself it sounds like your coping well so well done. I know how it feels having bad anxiety but you and me and everyone who suffers with it will be okay.