Hey all, just reaching out, my mum passed unexpectedly June 10th 2022. It was unexpected.
She had mentioned to me via video call only 5 days before she passed, that she had constant heartburn/ indegiston. I did tell her go to doctors, but as mums are, she told me ill be ok. She will just take heartburn aid.
That day i was out with my ex who remain great freinds, laughing and joking. Even got my mum with the video call to talk to a drag queen at our local gay bar. She laughed so much and smiled at us both stating have a good evening. ( i can still picture and remember the chat ) (i live nearly 120 miles away.
All seemed well next few days until i had a phone voicemail from my sister at 8am. Saying my mum was in hospital very ill. I need to get there asap. Living a distance, and no car i arranged a train. Got to preston then found out it was delayed… my sister then called saying she has hours to live. I panicked knowing train was not available so hired a taxi, knowing it would take atleast 2 hours. On my way i had the call in the taxi on my own. She had passed. That call changed my life. Couldnt get there any sooner. I wish i could. I got there and she was so peacfull in a room with my estranged brother and 3 sisters. She had gone and i still punish myself i wasnt there… even tho i live far away we were so close. She was my best freind and visiting so regulary.
She passed from bronchial pneumonia. They couldnt do anything as she was a smoker.
I still cant except it. I should of been there earlier to say goodbye. Now im left with feeling of guilt. I should of done something. The reason im writing this is because its not many weeks away from her anniversay of her death, but i just miss her and dont know how long this pain will last xxx
Life is so cruel xxxx