My Nan passed in March and I still feel as raw as I did that 1st day. We were extremely close and would speak on the phone once maybe twice a day and I visited her weekly.
I feel like the rest of my family are grieving 'properly ’ and moving pass things but I am stuck.
And also, if I hear she had ‘good innings’ one more time…
Hello @Arrie,
I can see you’re new to the community. I hope you find it to be a support to you, but I’m so sorry for the loss of your nan that brings you here.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support. In the meantime, you might want to take a look at these Sue Ryder resources.
Take good care and keep reaching out,
Seaneen
Hi. My Nanny passed away suddenly on Thursday. I’m struggling to come to terms with it and also feeling guilty for not being in contact as much recently. I can’t bear the thought of never speaking to her or hearing her lovely voice again. She was 89 and I’m grateful for all the time but it still wasn’t enough.
I’m so sorry for the loss of your Nan.
It sounds like you had a special relationship with her and she was a big part of your everyday life. It’s beautiful that you were so close.
I would like to say that the ‘good innings’ people officially suck. Love isn’t test cricket. It doesn’t matter how long someone was alive for. When you lose someone you love deeply, it hurts. That’s normal.
Some of the ‘good innings’ people say that to try and minimise your pain because it makes them uncomfortable. Or because death and loss make them uncomforable in general.
Some of the ‘grieving properly’ people really are coping. But others are hiding their real, raw loss behind a mask of socially unaccpetable grief.
If you can afford it, it can be helpful to speak with a counsellor or a psychologist who is trained in grief. Not so you can get over it, btw. Just so you can have a safe space to remember and grieve your nan without being pelted with the cricket bats and balls of the ‘good innings’ types.
Take care & be kind to yourself.