Dear All, I have been reading all your messages when Jeff was still alive as I was grieving since his diagnosis.
My lovely Jeff passed away on Tuesday 16th February. I feel soooo lonely, lost. I don’t enjoy anything. I go to bed earlier and earlier, because I can’t cope being without Jeff’s company. We were like twins, we even had same birthday.
This terrible MND disease needs to be cured. We can’t go like this - with no hope and just watching how our loved one is deteriorating alive is heartbreaking.
Sorry for your lost. Heart breaking. I wish i could tell you something to take the pain away.
Try to get in touch with family, friends and this community. Counselling if you can in Sue Ryder, cruse and mind are offering free counselling.
Think you are not alone all of us in this community are with you.
Try to eat and drink. Xx
Hope you are feeling better today.
Unfortunately i only can say try to eat, drink sleep, don’t rush, take you time (do the urgen paper work when you go numb) dont get hurt with insensitive comments of friends and family. Try to get counselling if you can talk with someone.
I was glad to find this community after 7 weeks of my husband passed, i was in despair due to the pain and the insensitive comments of some friends saying that i should move on,
I was sitting some days having flashbacks ( currently i sill doing it ),
I called Samaritans, i messaged the cruse bereavement service , they advised to eat, drink and sleep (easy to said it than do it)
I was in pain and frustration when i was trying to deal with paper work . so i just lefl the hours, days passed by when i was feeling “good” i eat something and went out to walk around (sometimes crying as i was walking) i slept when i was exausted as i was not sleeping at all.
Then i start reading the messages in this community i realise that others experiance same feeling, chaos and despair. It seems that time don’tcure but our mind get use to the "new life" unfortunately there isn’t timescale.
Post in this community there are people who is caring and really try to help.
Keep posting xx
Thank you DEVI. I really appreciate your advice.
I am trying my best, but it is very hard. I don’t enjoy anything as my husband and I have done everything together. Everywhere feels so empty and I even though I knew that I am going to loose Jeff very soon, I am not coping very well. I think about Jeff all the time. I see bees, and I think of him. He loved bees. I planted snowdrops especially for him so he can see them, but unfortunately he won’t now. It make me very sad. So many things we wanted to do together, but now is to late.
I was gardening over the weekend. I always loved gardening, but this time, I’ve done it without any feelings, without any joy. Jeff always watched me and not be able seeing him or feel his presence is very distressing. I really hope that one day I will be able to enjoy little things like I did before. I just feel lost, but as you said, I am not on my own. People in this website are suffering too. The worse things for me are the flash-backs of Jeff being poorly and when he slipped away when I was making him comfortable.
thank you and take care.
Petra x