Mother’s Day

This is my first one without my son . I also lost a grandson aged 24 10 weeks before my son pain full enough but the four weeks before my grandson I lost my female soulmate my best friend for 48 years . On the outside I’m looking in control but inside I’m hurting so much . I want to deal with my feelings but it hurst to much . I have a lovely hubby but I know he didn’t understand ( second marriage) . I have brilliant family on both side of out relationship and they do visit and ask if I’m ok . I just say yes good days and bad days . It’s only 10 weeks since I lost my son . I am a fighter as my son said don’t get ill I don’t have a spare mam . So I am trying to keep well. It’s hard . I miss them all so much. I would be sharing how I feel with my friend but she isn’t here . Roll on Monday x


Hi @ValC,

Thank you so much for sharing this with the community :blue_heart: I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been heard and you are not alone.

Take good care,

Thank you I’m a mess inside but feel
I have to be strong on the outside xx

Mother’s Day is a painful day for all us parents who’ve lost a child. I dread tomorrow as Thomas would send me a silly message, he always loved to send a daft message for any occasion. In fact he liked to send silly messages every day lol. I miss his daft ways.

We all grieve differently, there is no set way to get through this pain.

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Hi @ValC
My baby died during pregnancy some years ago, if he had lived he would be 16 now, :sob: mother’s Day is so painful without him. It’s so heartbreaking to loose a child. Sending hugs of support.

I lost my daughter nearly 3 years ago.
With time the pain gets easier to bear and you can look back at happy times and be grateful that you had the privilege of being that child’s mum.
You have had so much loss be kind to yourself. I have found joy in nature and all the beautiful birds and creatures in my garden.
Take support and give support to your family as they will all be grieving in different ways. Grief can drag a family apart, enjoy them all and move forward in your life proud and strong.
We never forget but remember with love and pride the time we had with our beloved child.

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Thank you take care

Hi Val

I’ve just come across your message. I haven’t logged on for a while.

I’m so sorry you’ve lost your son and grandson plus your friend.

We’re never prepared for multiple loss. Let alone one.

I lost my younger son Henry in October 2019. Ten weeks later my nephew died and ten weeks later his Mum, my sister in law died from Covid. It literally felt like a bomb had blown our family up. :broken_heart:

Don’t think about other people Val, let your feelings out. This site is brilliant , no judgement, we all manage things in our own way and there’s always someone to listen.

You must still be in absolute shock at the moment. So much loss in such a short time. My heart knows your pain and I can say in all honesty that you get used to it . You will learn a way to live with it.

You’re being so brave . Tears and sadness are cleansing but also exhausting. You’re not on your own Val and that will strengthen you

Sending a warm hug and love

I have just read your message thank you for the reply . While I hoped this year would feel better it’s not . I except the first special days will be difficult but I’m glad Mother’s Day has moved on . I even got card gifts from my family but he was missing . I have a lovely husband but don’t feel we can share my thinking he wants me to be strong and in his own way I know he means well . But it’s easier not to talk to him . I’ve applied for some bereavement counselling which I hope will help . Today has been positive I’ve had a swim and it’s nice to hear the bird without the rain . X take care

I still try to celebrate mothers day as l still celebrate my daughter’s life and my pride in being her mum. It’s hard but as time goes on it will get easier.
You are doing all the right things. It is strange how much nature helps especially the birds. Robins will come into your garden which is said to show a loved one is near.
I am going to plant lots of seeds this year as when they turn into plants the sense of renewal feeds my soul.
You are doing so well. I tried counselling and went to a spiritual medium. You will find your comfort. You, like myself, are on a journey.