Hi all , I wonder if I can get some advice please. So my partner/fiancee died 3yrs ago in May and I still struggle daily with all sorts from eating to walking the dogs . His family very rarely contact me unless they want something which I suppose I should expect as it was always gregg that kept in contact with them ! Some of my friends rallied when gregg died but that didn’t last long although they do ask me out but they live 10 miles away and it’s always me that has to travel to see them even though I think they could share the cost to come to me some just refuse and then the others follow as I’m by myself with limited income. My family I have to say are no better even though being the eldest child I have taken care of them and there families. Anyway sorry I’m rambling on ! So my dilemma is , I have been offered a home swap which yesterday I thought was great to be closer to family and friends but today my anxiety is gone sky high ,and mental health is the same. its a smaller home but more expensive by about £20 month. And then I worry the dogs won’t cope and then of course I will have to get rid off all of greggs stuff that I still haven’t done and then I feel like I’m deserting gregg as we shared our home for 20yrs . By the way I have no memories of gregg it’s like my brain has shut it off
Please can anyone offer any advice x
Marie do you think your family will contact you more if you move. If that’s the only reason you are moving i would think very carefully it’s going to cost you to move plus you said its a dearer property and your on low income plus council tax may be more. And do you really want to get rid of greggs stuff? Lots of things to take into account mate just do what’s right for you . Hope this helps I’m not trying to put a damper on things but when we are in grief we don’t always make the right decisions.
I think the reason for moving is I’m so very lonely with no friends in my area at the moment it was only ever myself and gregg . Thanks all x
Hello @marie51 - I would advise you to stay where you are. It is familiar and you are not ready, I would guess, for all the upheaval that would be involved. Sit tight and stick with what you know - not least if money is tight and the new place more expensive. Gregg is all around you in your home, too.
I would say, if the people you are wishing would show more of an interest in you and make more of an effort are not doing so now. I really can’t see them making any effort if you move closer. They obviously know you are on your own and it doesn’t seem to make them want to be more helpful. As the saying goes, you can lead horse to water. But you can’t make it drink . Hope you find the answer