Its almost a year, 20 Dec when my mother went into hospital for a minor operation, and ended up having major surgery where the surgeons discovered she had a mass cancer in her stomach. Mum spent 3 months in hospital and accepted her demise.on 31st December 2018. Mum made a recorded message in december to plan her funeral stating the clothes, jewellry where to be buried and even organised food for her wake. Mum was allowed home under end of life 26th March, and died on 1st April. My mum was the matriach of the family, and a division has happened between the remaining brothers and sisters.
I have had a plerthora of deaths since that period.
My younger cousin, Maureen whos father is related to my mother, died of stomach cancer 13th April 2 weeks later.
He flew from the carribean to attend Maureens funeral in May. On his return home, he died 3 weeks later whilst travelling to the hospital.
The most devestating death i am finding hard to accept is for my determined sister, mother, Jenny. Rip 6th October. Jenny stayed overnight at mums hospital, and woke up saying she had a lump in her arm. I thought it was heat bump. She was diagnosed with an incurable form of cancer from.a.gene, which.was located in her lymph and died in Guys hospital on 6th October. I
My uncle joe ( mums cousin) died from contracting flu, whilst he had prostrate cancer he died on 23rd November.
I feel numb most nights, cannot sleep, and I wont celebrate Christmas but need to be there for jennys teenage children 2 boys agef 14, 16 and a 19 year old daughter. I am doing lots of yoga, but today dlipped back into the anger phrase of grief, feeling how i.hate this life at present.
Polly101, What an awful amount of losses you’ve had this year. My Mum passed away 10 weeks ago today , so it’s still very raw.
I’m glad you’ve found this site, as everyone her is lovely and many understand how traumatic, sad and difficult it all is.
I’m so sorry to hear that so many of your family have died. You really have had a terrible year and it’s not surprising that you are struggling. Although the idea of the phases of grief is very commonly known, it is actually completely normal not to go through them in any linear way - you may experience many of them at once or go back to feelings that you had earlier on. With multiple bereavements, your feelings may be even more all over the place.
I’m glad that you’ve found this site and I hope it helps even a tiny bit to have this space to get things off your chest. I just wanted to let you know that we had another user join recently called @Babbzkash21 who has also experienced multiple bereavements - you might be interested to check out their posts.
Sue Ryder also offers an online bereavement counselling service, if you ever feel that you would benefit from a chance to get some one-to-one support. Find out more: www.sueryder.org/counselling
thank u for your kind words of support Priscilla. I am glad i found somewhere to share the conversations in my head. I was skeptical and even considered deleting my post.Thank you for the warm welcome
Daffy,. Losing Mum no matter what the circumstances is unbearable. Thank u for calming my nerves.
Polly101, if you’ve got bad nerves there’s a great book called “Self help for your nerves” by Claire Weekes. It’s very old style but it contains a lot of wisdom.
Even my nerves are jangled with one loved one passing.