I think your no soul comment sums it up! When the paramedic called the gp it was the gp my mum had had an argument with 2 days previously. She had said to my mum unless she wanted anti depressants she couldnāt help herā¦2 days later she was shocked to hear my mum had died! I said loud enough for her to hear well yeah coz shes the one she had an argument with 2 days ago!!
I am forever traumatised by finding my mum in bed cold, my 999 call made it worse as despite telling them she was cold she was insisting I try to get her onto the floor to start cprā¦I am disabled myself due to crippling RA & a back op gone wrong & I kept saying sheās cold. She had me knocking on doors trying to get someone to help get her on the floor to start cpr. The postman saw me crying & knocking doors & I maintain he was my hero that day! He got her on the floor & started cpr. When the paramedic turned up he took one look & said sheās started rigor. There was no need to drag her out of bed as i kept saying she was cold. I sat on the floor with her for ages stroking her face & just holding her & the postman phoned my brother to give him the news. My brother walked in & thought our mum had fallen & thatās how I found herā¦on the floor. I had to explain to him she was in bed & looked peaceful & not to remember walking into thar scene just think of her laying in bed.
All this caused by people who will go on with their lives & possibly destroy more families. This is why Iām taking over her med neg claim, I want some form of justice by the way of someone being held accountable finally, money means nothing to me i want accountability.
That day although on December 15th 2021 is still as clear & vivid as if it was yesterday & as I write this I am again crying. She had already bought all the grandkids presents & made my eldest daughter, her first grandchild, a special cushionā¦she was an amazing seamstress! Christmas was hard for the grandchildren. She had picked out the perfect presents for them & wasnāt here to see them open them.
Iām so sorry you are going through this too. Itās traumatic and heart breaking. For them.to ask you to do all that basically do their job is a joke! As if finding her isnāt traumatic enough that you had to do all that when you rang them for help. The people are supposed to be there to help you in a situation like that. One word disgusting!
I know i have PTSD due to all of this and they donāt even help you at all.
Like you my partner and I were in a debate with the GP and paramedic. With the GP we wanted help and explained how poor the hospital was. We also explained that the nurses who had been coming to the house werenāt listening to our concerns. He confirmed we were right and they were very wrong. He said if we want her to get better the hospital is the best place for her to be. We didnt want her to go to that hospital as they are very very poor in their level of care. We wanted a different one. Despite numerous hospital in the area the paramedic refused to take her anywhere else. They truly are a joke. I would never behave in such a way ever so I really donāt know how these people.live with themselves. Hence no soul as you have to have no soul to be so heartless and careless with peopleās lives and loved ones. But as I said in my previous post you canāt behave in such away and get away Scott free. Karma.will.come back to haunt all of them in some form or another ten fold. I say that with true conviction. Exactly and they just carry on as if itās noting. No justice must happen.
Yes justice must be served and youāre doing the right thing. .Iām routing for you. I need to get my act toget her the whole thing has ruined me and I have mental block when I try to even sit down to it. I have to do something though as itās killing me.
I am.the same and it has been a few years. Like it was yesterday. It bizarre as i havenāt been able to speak to anyone about it but felt I needed to do something as Iām going downhill rapidly so thought Iād try this. Like you so much has happened.
I completely get that. Occasions are horrendous as itās another reminder they arenāt with us. Everyday is horrendous and occasions make it worse. This mothers day I felt so lost I had to buy some stuff to commemorate it but is so heartbreaking like you said they arenāt their to receive it. Iāve also done that and bought gifts from her. Itās just so heartbreaking.
I completely understand itās a struggle everyday. It is with me everyday and there are moments where I am deep in thought about mum and our memories and I just burst out crying. I canāt handle knowing I canāt see mum, canāt know if sheās okay somewhere out there, waiting for a sign, wondering if there has been a sign. It would have been very difficult if mum had died naturally and been told and got the treatment she should have been given but we would have had to accept as hard as it is. But to know that mum was never told and got left to die over all that time, died because of the hospitals negligence and all those so called consultants involved, and that mum would have been here right now chatting away to me I cannot bare it. She is my first and last thought every single day. thank you for your replies too I will try come back on here it may be a while or it may not be just with everything going on in background I need to make sure I fight as hard as canā¦for mum. She deserves that. I hate knowing they are still out there going to work and never have to live like me and my family do now. I hate knowing my mum should have been here until her 80s or 90s seeing me grow up have kids get married etc. I just wish she was here and knowing those monsters did nothing I canāt stand the thought because mum should be here. They did this.
Itās so horrible.Iām empathise completely. The same with the sign I wish I got signs too. The whole thing is unbearable. The damage that they have caused is deep routed. They have caused irreparable damage in so many ways.
Aww well put your all into your fight. I wish you all the very best with it. Iām routing for you. They need to be brought to justice. I completed understand . You have basically just written out some.of the things I wrote for my mums eulogy. An unbearable feeling of being robbed of the person and so much more.
Hi i know this is from 2022 and i realize you might not be even looking at this anymore. But something a bit similar has happened to my mum. Although she was 88 she fidnt have dementia and was only on high blood pressure tablets and arthritis tablets. To cut to the point she had a pain in her leg, vomitted and we took her to a&e she had to wait hours to be seen and eventually she gojnd out shd had a tumour on her colon needed emergency operation and ended up dying after the op.
My mum had been neglected by the nhs local practice she could never get an appointment. I just hope you are coping ok. Its terrible. Just terrible.
My dad was also taken from us as a result of negligence. He was really good at looking after his health, and was continually making appointments in primary care about a cough he had. In the end, he was self medicating with vitamin D and antihistamines because they werenāt getting to the bottom of it. Not once was he given a GP appointment despite being 75+. He was seen by a ātrainee clinical practitionerā who dad was told was a paramedic (whereās the clarity??). The cough was symptomatic of a blockage in an artery. The same primary care centre caused the demise of my friendās dad who they turned away with symptoms of prostate cancer. I warned my parents, but I had no idea that the cough could be fatal. I just thought it was niggly and irritating for my dad.
I feel like you do. The anger and resentment and pain, knowing that my dad did everything to keep himself healthy. And weāre without him now because of cuts to the NHS which mean that a GP is now not accessible even for people 75+. Itās truly abhorrent. If a country doesnāt have functional healthcare provision then itās a very poor country indeed.
Iām going to be filling it in about my dad who was never diagnosed, and had fatal ischemic heart disease, and my mum, whose blood pressure medication was messed about with, against guidelines, and who had a hypertensive emergency as a result.
Thanks all for your messages above. Honestly anyone whos lost someone through medical negligence the pain and suffering is on another level. I used to be a confident happy person im now just left riddled with anxiety and depression and cant get over what they did to my mum. I try and move forward for my mums sake and because i have to try and keep my job as have bills so its hard to show how truly feel there. I always used to hear about mental health and in all honesty never fully understood it until now. Left taking tablets which i hate having to take, turned more to drinking and nightmares about what they did had to get some sleeping tablets. We visit a grave my mum whos life was stolen and would have still been hereā¦yet the people that did this just gets sweeped under the carpet. They can live their lives. Mine has become a shell of a life.
Thanks for your message. Sorry to hear about your terrible experience aswell just read all the above. Its truly devastating. I know its hard as ill only see a private one due to the circumstances. I know i will need to see one at some point i got recommend mind but they werent in my area. Its so hard as there are so many triggers when ya hear people talking about hospitals or nhs. Even writing their name i hate it. We dont watch the news anymore. My partner been there 100% and more feel bad for him as i try be happy and make memories but some days i just feel numb. I always think how mum would want me to move forward. Unfortunately the stress has caused so much. I know its because ill never get past what they did
P.s yes it really makes ya think dont it life is short and someone who can seem bubbly and happy is actually dying inside. Ya hear that alot with comedians.
Iām so sorry for your loss, this sounds so agonising. And so traumatic.
Similarly, my grandad recently passed after being sent home multiple times from A&E, not having his scans looked at, not being taken seriously with his chest pain. Two days ago he dies suddenly from Cardiac arrest after being sent home once again from A&E about two weeks ago.
The fury I feel. The agony. I keep thinking he should be here. And they killed him. What sort of murderer sends someone home without telling them a lump has grown bigger in your case or not looking into chest pain.
I just want to let you know that I understand your pain, and your mum and my grandad deserved better than the absolute stupidity that they got.
Thanks for your message. Im so sorry to hear this too. Thats horrible. I just hate knowing the people who did this walk free. Why arent their sentences and laws for this? Its like because they have medical in their industry they get a free pass. Its disgusting. I know there were multiple scans but they put clear on all even though it was never clear so there was no chance for any treatment or anything.
I just feel like their must be something we can do peititon this their needs to be stricter laws. There will never ever be justice because they have killed our blood. But in this world they dont care.
The system is totally broken. Some people will say āNo itās not - I get great care from my GP/hospital etc.ā but they fail to see that if it doesnāt work for everyone, then it works for no one. Itās a national health service, and having pockets of good care is not acceptable. It needs to be a service that keeps everyone who uses it healthy and safe, and it canāt because itās been starved of funds for over a decade.
The way Starmer talked about the NHS recently, saying something like he wouldnāt fund it until it reformed. What a smack in the mouth to the hard working staff.
We should all revolt. Literally. Down tools until they give it the funding it needs.
Today Iāve finally been able to request my dadās primary care notes, after the solicitor (who didnāt come cheap!) sat on the grant of probate for over a month .
I have a specific question for this thread - how do we find any joy in life, when we know that our loved oneās death was completely avoidable. In my case, it was medical negligence, but in other cases it might be contamination by carcinogens - I have a lot of friends and family in North Wales who died of aggressive cancers and lived or went to school near Trawsfynydd nuclear power plant.
How do we cope and get by, when we know that the centre of our universe would still be here for many more decades in very good health, if it wasnāt for our governments and their perverse decisions. Anyone know?
I honestly donāt know how to cope. It was confirmed today that my grandads death was avoidable.
He would still be alive, walking around, being my beautiful grandfather. It feels like heās just died all over again.
All the regret and guilt and sadness is just piling up all over again. Like you said how do you cope knowing that they could be here with you as they always had, but theyāve essentially been murdered by incompetent healthcare.
Iām so sorry to read that. I can sense the devastation and sadness in your post.
Iāve received the primary care notes for my dad today, and Iām more convinced that thereās a case to answer, as they continually explored a respiratory route while noting no family history of respiratory illness, and the only family history written there is his dadās heart attack due to heart disease.
Thereās also things like his cough being worse in the morning, being short of breath on exertion, and not coughing at all during the consultation.
Plus, he went for consultation many many more times than I realised. 8 or 9 times over 4 years.
Your poor grandad . How was the negligence confirmed, if you donāt mind me asking? Was it the result of a complaint?
Once again Burgled Iām sorry you have to go through such a horrible situation. And reading through the primary care notes must have been hard.
Similar to your dad, my grandad kept up with his health and monitored his health. He phoned, visited GPās and hospitals to try and get to the bottom of his chest pain.
And they were just let down in the worst way possible. It just horrible that they didnāt give your dad the due diligence of at least a proper medical examination and appointments with GPās.
I donāt know the ins and outs because my mother has been keeping it very close and I her chest. But I just know my grandad tried his best.
Your poor grandad. Does he leave behind your grandma, or did she go first? Itās terrible - people in their autumn years need to be kept safe. We all do, but health risks rise as we age, and issues that arise need a closer eye on them. Hoenstly, I secretly thought that my dad was invincible. But without me realising it, heād slowly crept into an at-risk category. So now Iām like a hawk all over my mumās health.
I know 
