I lost my mum two years ago, she died of a heart attack, still find it hard getting on with things with out her, feel like I’m still grieving but I’m not sure, don’t no if I have fully accepted how she died, find it hard to talk about it don’t no if it’s because I found her, don’t want to think about it, feel like don’t like how she died

Dear Bambrr1091,

In your profile you write that you wonder if you are still grieving and if it would help you to ‘open up more.’ I think it will. Grieving is a process and there is no set time for it. Some people may say that we never really stop grieving, but the thoughts and feelings will change over time. Grief has so many aspects: denial, anger, numbness, sadness to name but a few. It is a very personal journey. If you have read through some of the posts on this site, you will have seen many different stories, but we all have one thing in common: someone we loved dearly is missing from our life and we are trying to find a way to live without them. What is helpful to some, may not be the same to others, but I think that it always helps to talk (or write) about our feelings, especially with someone who has also lost someone and knows what it feels like. You have taken a brave step by coming to this community. You write that you found your mum and that you find it hard to even think about it, let alone talk. I can understand that. There were certain things I did not talk about for some time until someone asked me certain questions and then when I did talk about it was like a relief and I did not mind that it brought back the tears. I have read posts on this site from people who had to watch CPR or do CPR and found it very traumatic. The replies they got showed that they were not alone and that there were others who knew exactly what that was like, and somehow sharing experiences can make you feel less alone. The last memories are often the strongest, but I have found that gradually they will fade and that we are able to focus on the happier memories we have of our loved ones. I hope that you will find this site helpful.

I lost my Mum a year and a half ago and I don’t foresee any leap in how I’m feel. I’m still grieving. It’s raw and painful. To me, two years is very little time. I also don’t like to think about my Mums ending.

My Dad died over twenty years ago and it does get better over a period of time. Take care.

Thought it would feel better about handling certain things, with out her, seems to get harder and just block everyone out xx

Thank u for replying xx