Hello, im dealing with my mum who has terminal cancer, it has spread to her rib so now bone cancer, she is in hospital, pain management are now involved but keep changing the medication without mum knowing, she has pain under control but she is always feeling sick.
Im worried about her , why the nausea all the time?
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Hi,
I’m so sorry to hear about your mum, what a terrible and stressful time you must be having, my heart goes out to you.
I’m definitely not an expert, but my mum had pancreatic cancer that had spread to her liver and she felt sick all the time. I’m guessing it is to do with the position of the cancer, although I don’t know where your mum’s started, so I could well be wrong.
My mum was given anti sickness tablets and, when she was unable to swallow, she was given the anti sickness meds via an injection, is that something that you could maybe ask for?
Sending you love x
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Hi and thank you for responding, she had tounge cancer which she was in remission for but it spread to the lungs which haven’t progressed but gome to the rib?
Im at a loss why she keps on feeling ill, she has a RIG in place so is tjst why? She had a dialation and the throat is opening up xx
I wonder if it is the RIG causing it then, I wonder if you could ask them to check it to make sure all is as it should be? I’m sorry, I’m really not any use to you at all. I thought it might have been if there was cancer somewhere in the gastric tract, but that’s not the case for your mum.
Could you ring MacMillan and ask for their advice? They are very helpful. I hope you get some answers xx
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Hi Nori,
Thanks for your message, palliative care are now involved and she is responding well to the morphine and cyclazine anti sickness, no wretching for days, hopefully she can be home soon and take it day by day.
We had a good talk today and once home, sort out things we really didnt want to talk about , its about making memories and enjoying time together.
Im so sorry about your husband, are you getting support? I may need counselling along with my brother who has additional needs , maybe mum too?
Hi Nori
The consultant did say there were options but he said he dudnt want her to go through it and potentially be poorly and waste the time she had, which i understand, she is on fentynol slow releasing 12mg and morphine PNR
The cancer nurses have been absolutely awful and no help or support, said they ring her but never did, really let her down , i will be putting a complaint in about them in time.
Another lady i know is also not happy with them also.
She had tounge cancer two years ago which went but only been able to drink in the last few weeks due to a dilatation to open up her throat, she is peg fed so really been through the mill.
Well you are always welcome to talk to me on here and share your experiences, im glad you have counselling, whete did you find the counselling if you dont mind me asking? Xx
Hi Nori,
How are you? Mum is home but very frail , had to go the gp yesterday as mum has thrush in her mouth and ulcers, doc was fabulous, given treatment for thrush which is working and upped fentayl patches to 25ml, i realised she isnt going to get any better and sleeps alot, the palliative care team are visiting her tomorrow.
How are things with you? Xx
Hi Lucy, how are you too? Xx
Hi, lovely to hear from you. I’m glad that your mum is home and that the palliative tram are supporting you both. I’m sorry to hear that she is frail and sleepy, but it’s good that she’s getting the right medication and that you are able to spend precious time with her.
How are you holding up? I understand how incredibly difficult this is for you and you must be exhausted at the moment.
I am sending you both love and best wishes and will continue to think of you xx
Hi everybody, im having a hard time tonight, mum is not coping well with the diagnosis and i dont know what to say to her.
Its so hard keeping a brave face on, we went out yesterday shopping and she did really well but didnt sleep well last night.
She has a hospital appointment tomorrow and is shattered today, not the person she was at all , im losing her day by day, absolutely heartbreaking 
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Hi Nori
Good evening, hope your ok as well as can be? Thank you for texting back, im trying to sort out a spa day for mum even if its just a swim and hydrotherapy pool, no treatments to get her in some head space, i have had to go back to work as i only have off till December on a full pay but im reluctant but i will see how things go xx
Im glad your other half can enjoy the footie, something to occupy the time and spend quality time with friends xx
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I’m so sorry to hear about your mum’s diagnosis. I’m really glad you’re getting support from the community.
I just wanted to share these details with you too in case they’re helpful right now. Macmillan provide practical and emotional support to people living with cancer and their families. You can call the Macmillan Support Line on 0808 808 00 00 (open 7 days a week, 8am to 8pm).
You can also chat online to them here.
Please do keep reaching out here, too - you are not alone 
Hi everybody, i have not been on this chat for a while, mum is having terrible back pain and im wondering if its the cancer spreading? It is i know, she can hardly stand now , its awful to see, such a vibrant women down to a old women
Crying most of the day now , its nevrr ending and emotionally draining x
Hi Nori,
Thank you for replying, how is your husband standing now? Has the stay in the hospice helped with that and pain management? Im glad he is home with you,
No more scans just pain management, she is on 15ml morphine and fetyanal patches slow releasing.
We saw the pain management doctor yesterday and she is going to try patches for the back with local anesthetic to numb the pain.
She did say a stay in hospital for pain management balance, do you think this has made a difference to your husband?
Nice to hear ftom you x
Hi Nori,
Do you think thats a low doesage? It really worries me seeing her in pain, she recently started having pain in her back and its a hard lump. She is so active with going out with friends and coffee mornings and that has been taken from her.
Today she has just sat on the sofa all day and slept, i winder if its the morphine as its a higer doesage now?
We have been told that a hospice woukd be a good idea to manage the pain, at first she freaked out as she thought of it as where you go to die but had a chat with doctor yesterday and come round to it. How does your husband cope day to day? Its so hard and do you have support?
Where i live in North Wales there isnt any drop in centres or face to face counselling x
Good evening Nori,
Im sorry it has been nearly two weeks since i got back i touch, mum is going into a hospice tomorrow after the doc for pain management saw her and called the local hospice and got her in, she is alittle apprehensive thinking she wont come out but with all my heart, she will be home after sorting her out.
How is your husband? Its a bloody nightmare not being able to read through your texts as i write to be able to answer your questions, i hope you enjoyed Halloween with the children and hubby, i really hope you all can be together 
, i have been told thst mum may need a perching chair?? For doing things when she comes out of the hospice to keep her independence, have you got one of them??
Lots of love
Becca xx
Hi Nori,
Im so sorry to hear your husband isnt doing too well, its just so unfair, you feel like your grieving all the time, im mentally and physically tired, you must be too,
It must have been to hear your eldest say that, bless him, sounds like he is a lovely thoughtful lad and im sure is a credit to you and husband
Well its nearly a week since mum went into the hospice, tweaking this and that, she is enjoying a foot massage every day but still in pain, i have a meeting with the doctor tomorrow so i will see how that goes, we saw the social worker today and she is going to do a referral about my brother and get him a social worker for him and i can be his appointee in time.
I felt so low today and had to leave work , im not going back, its too much trying to work, visit mum and look after my brother.
How are you coping? Have you got a good support network? Xx
Yes i think something has to give, oh j do hope he gets into the hospice and get his levels sorted , thinking of you all xx
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