It is so sad and heartbreaking. I send my condolences on the passing away of your beautiful mum.
I agree that I am the same as you in that i cry too every day and Saturday is a day where I am even more heartbroken like you are at the later end of Saturday.
I believe that losing our beautiful mums doesn’t get any better. In a way and it sounds an odd thing to say, but i would feel guilty if I didn’t cry about mum.
We lived together 60 and a half years. Like you and your mum, we did everything together. My life isn’t the same anymore because mam was my life. I am on my own now and it isn’t something I can get used to.
People sometimes but not often say what do you want? The only thing I want and need is to have mam back.
God bless that you were with your mum as i was with my mam when she passed away. I still cannot believe that mam isn’t here physically. When i am out and see older ladies I get jealous thinking that should be my mam who is walking about.
It helps to message Victoria. I know it doesn’t change anything but it helps us support each other a little. Feel free to message when you want to again.
Sending you all my kindest regards and warmest wishes. Stephen.
Hi Stephen. Thanks for the reply. How have you been this week? That sounds interesting volunteering. Do you get to meet a lot of people? I can understand changing your shopping day. Sometimes its too hurtful to repeat some of the things we did in our previous life as I call it. Iv had a very up and down week, mostly down to be honest but i let my grief happen as it wants to. Iv never been very good at holding things in to be honest I have to just express it as it comes usually in tears. Its definitely good to have a routine though. Harry dog gets me out for walks which gives me some fresh air but I do struggle a lot still. Nearly 2 weeks for mum. Can’t beleive iv survived this long really. I hope your well as can be Stephen x
Thank you for your message. I can completely empathise when you say you cannot believe it is two weeks since your beloved mum passed away. I feel the same way too. It was 30 weeks on Saturday since mam passed away.
My week has been up and down really.
Like you I let my tears flow. I can be just doing something and think of mam and start crying. Most days going through my head is: I miss mam so much. I wish you were here mam. I cannot help thinking it.
I keep busy but it isn’t always enough. It is good that you have Harry the dog so you can go on walks with him.
The nights are getting darker early and the mornings too. Mam wasn’t keen on that, but she liked when we could draw the curtains and get comfortable and cosy.
It is my shopping day today. I go about 9.00am and it generally takes an hour or so.
God bless and sending you all my kindest regards and best wishes Stephen.
Hi Stephen. How have you been doing? Iv not been on as much as I’ve had the funeral etc to sort. There were also issues around mums care so it needs to go to an inquest. All these things make me question could mum still be here if she had been cared for correctly. It really affects me. Me and mum also liked this time of year. We would be getting excited for Christmas now. We would also like getting cosy and lighting the fire to watch our shows. It really is so hard isnt it. Hope your doing ok. X
God bless you. It must be so heartbreaking on top of the passing of your beautiful mum to have an inquest. I really feel for you. I can totally understand why you feel the way you do about it. I know this won’t help you much by me saying it, but you yourself did everything you could have done for your mum.
Christmas will be very difficult this year. Just as you and your mum did, me and mam loved the build up to Christmas more than Christmas itself. Except Christmas day. We would put a few decorations up. Mam loved seeing them. Buying and writing cards. Buying gifts and wrapping up. Mam loved wrapping up. She always liked to add ribbons and bows too.
I will put three things up for Christmas in remembrance of mam. I told my brother I am not sending cards or presents. I will get my card to mam and mam’s card to me down from last Christmas and put them up.
Sending you all my warmest wishes and kindest thoughts. God bless. Stephen.
@Becky29 I’m so so sorry for your loss. My 94 year old Mum lives over 200 miles away from me and had a heart attack last week, the day after I video-called her from the hospital where my wife was receiving her final days’ care. The pain of having to deal with my wife’s passing on top of my Mum’s condition is horrendous. Mum remains in hospital receiving treatment for several other conditions too, so doesn’t know about my wife passing yet. I cannot get in a car and drive 4.5 hours to be with Mum at the moment due to my grief and the arrangements I need to be making for my wife, so it’s a double-whammy. I only have Mum and my brother left from the original family, and the latter I have not spoken to for a number of years following a family fallout over financial irregularities. Life has thrown us all a complete basket of rubbish. Even though I’ve only been on this group for a couple of days, they’ve helped me to focus and handle my thoughts and feelings a little better. There is so much strength here on this group and I am sending you some of that which I myself have gained from it. A day at a time as they say. All the best.
Hi Stephen. Thanks for your reply. It has been very difficult with the inquest side of things. It makes me think more and more mum should of been here if not for the fall. That adds another layer to my grief unfortunately. But thank you for your kind words. I would of done anything in the world to save my lovely mum as we all would of. That’s a nice idea to do something in remembrance for Christmas. Me and mum spoke about it a little bit when she got to the hospice and I said I did not feel like celebrating it. She told me I still needed to at least put some nice lights up and think of her i will do that for her but it will be horrendous really and im not looking forward to it. At least we can talk to one another to get through it. Take care of yourself. X
Hi Robin and thank you for your lovely message. I am so very sorry to hear about your wife and about your mum. It is a horrendous time and I really feel for you dealing with all you have going on. My heart and thoughts go out to you. Remember you are doing your best in a very difficult situation. I can sympathise with the family issue. I have two sisters and unfortunately one of those has been very selfish and self centred all her life but even when our mum was ill and in the hospice. I do not want any relationship with her now as i couldn’t forgive her behaviour. Luckily I do have another sister who is the opposite. Your not alone though as you say this space is a great support. There will always be someone to answer you and help get you through the day. Take care of yourself x
i will do that for her but it will be horrendous really and im not looking forward to it. At least we can talk to one another to get through it. Take care of yourself. X