My beautiful nan

I lost my nan yesterday and I cannot cope with being without her. I do not know how to cope. I want to look into anti depressants as I’ve heard they numb your pain. But I also want other ways to try to deal with the loss as I cannot even bear to live without her. So I’m trying this out and seeing where it goes. I dread going to sleep even though I’m tired but I cannot stop thinking about her. The pain is so unbearable and if I allow myself to cry I feel like I’m suffocating. I miss and love her so much. Anyone know how to deal with this

Dear Mimi,

Welcome to the Sue Ryder Online Community. I’m so sorry your nan died. You certainly loved your nan very much, and the pain is still very raw. The first days are normally very difficult, but hopefully, you will start feeling a bit better soon.

I’m glad that you’ve found this site, as many of our users find that it helps a little to have somewhere to write openly about their feelings and get support from others who understand. While you wait for more replies to your post, you may also wish to read and reply to some posts by others who have also lost their nans, for example:

If you feel that you’re not coping, the first step is to visit your GP, as they can refer you to counseling, or even prescribe antidepressants if they feel you might benefit.

You can also contact Cruse Bereavement Care. They have a free helpline that you can call for support, the number is 0808 808 1677. You can find more information on their website:

If there’s anything I can help you with, or you have any questions about this site, just let me know.

Best wishes,


I lost my nan too this year. I happened so quickly, literally the time she got sick to her death was 23hours. I knew she was going to die the night before so I let myself cry as much as I could then. When it actually happened I was able to be strong for my family. It didn’t really hit me until a week later. Some days are better than others. It’s hard when it’s night and you’re left alone with your thoughts but it’s helpful to know you’re not alone.