My dad my reason to go on.

Hello, i lost my dad 4th December 2014. He died in my arms i tried mt hardest to save him. I cared for him 24 hours a day but he was my best friend soul mate, i remember planning to go with him using his medication for months i tried. But woke up with his voice in my mind saying ‘what was the point of me being your dad if you can’t carry on my legacy’
Since then in the same calender year lost my nan and uncle. I feel lost and am drinking heavy AGAIN with chronic pancreatitis:(

Hello @Abz29,

I can see you have just joined the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and for sharing how you are feeling. It sounds as though you have been through such a lot in the last few years, caring for your Dad and best friend 24/7, witnessing his death and processing it afterwards before having to grieve the loss of your Nan and Uncle so close together. That is so very tough - it is not surprising that you are feeling lost.

It sounds as though you are reaching out for support here so thank you again for being so brave and doing so. If you do feel the thoughts you have had about wanting everything to end continue or get too much, please reach out to one of the following organisations who are always just a call or text away anytime you would like someone to talk to:

Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence - you can call them on 116 123 or email if you’d prefer to write things down.
● Similarly, Shout are contactable 24/7 but this time by text - all you need to do is text SHOUT to 85258 and talk to them about anything.
● You can find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline here.
● If you are at risk of harming yourself, please call 999 or contact your GP for an emergency appointment immediately.

Sue Ryder also offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and
sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home - if you’re interested in this, you can find out more here: You can also make an appointment with your GP (you may be having appointments anyway because of your chronic pancreatitis) and ask to be referred to counselling or other support services, relevant to your situation, in your area.

You deserve the right care and support, @Abz29, so please keep reaching out and consider getting in touch with one of these services.

Take care - please know you’re not alone,

Online Community team

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