I lost my dad to prostate cancer 8.11.2024 passed Friday and I couldnt be there to hold him. He battled with it for 6 years and didnt want to do anything about it. He was using herbs and tried to heal himself naturally. Then he just gave up. Last time i saw him when i went home for my holiday a month ago he looked bad. He couldnt leave the house anymore and lost so much weight. The last thing i remember was hugging his body and saying goodbye to him as i was leaving to go to the airport. He just gave up and wanted to join God. Couple of days ago he ended up at the hospital. And a few days after he died. Apparently, god was calling him and he just gave up. Maybe he was ready to go. I have to be the one strong for my mom and my brother. It sucks loosing a parent especially because i thought i had all the time to spend with him still. I cried at home for two days on my own. I hope he is at peace with the angels and is actually free from this pain. 
i just didnt have the time to say goodbye 
to him. Or say to him that i love him. But i hope he knows. I am 39 i just wish he saw me with a baby and a husband. I feel guilty i wasn’t there more often. 
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My mum died unexpectedly last week and the pain and guilt and loss in unbearable it’s such a physical pain I can’t cope with
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I can emphasise that. I am just in an absolute shock. Its unreal. So sorry you lost your mom! Love 
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