My Dad

Losing a parent
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Lost my dad on 16th April :broken_heart:

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Hello @Kim14,

I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about your dad. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that might be helpful.

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,

Alex

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Thankyou,
Some days I am ok and then it breaks me all over again

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@Kim14 my Dad died on 8/3 & sometimes it feels like yesterday. Other times it feels an age away. He’s the first person I think of in the morning. Partly because I think it’s all been a dream. I think we just have to weather the storm as painful as that is. I hope you have a supportive network of people looking after you. X

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I lost my father to, so I want say how do you feel, feeling disconnected and numb around people is normal though, so if you feel this dont worry. Theres alot to deal with emotionally but talking to others should help.

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I lost my father on 7th April. So much has been happening that I havent been able to grieve for him or even accept that he’s gone…except that on some level I do because I’m so upset when I can’t ring him. Its very odd. I wish I could help. You have to keep going because you are half him and you need to live and be happy for him.

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Today is a bad day :cry:

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Having a good cry is good, being emotional on the lose of a love one is just being human.

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I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my dad on 13 June this year. I’ve already had to deal with the first Father’s Day without him but as time goes on I don’t feel like i’m getting any better. I know it’s all about dealing with and processing grief but I feel like a completely different person and sinking into a depression. I’m back at work but not doing much else because I don’t have the inclination or energy to do anything else. I keep getting told it gets better but i’m struggling to believe it

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They say time is a great heeler, but as you revistit celebrations like the loved ones birthday, its still difficult. I’ve found happy times is remembering the good things we all did together, its what makes us happy and smile again. But the tears will always come, thats a natural reaction to grief its funny like that.

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Im in the same boat kind of. I lost my dad 22nd june this year i feel numb and just have to get on with life now :frowning:
Going back to work tomorrow just for a few hours on a phased return but im dreading it, i felt okay yesterday about going back but will have ups and downs, im not sure if im pushing myself too soon to go back as i kind of dont want to now :frowning:

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Having a phased return to work after a loss like you have suffered seems a good idea, getting back in to routine is hard but it gives us something else to think about which is healthy. Good luck I hope it all goes well for you.

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I went back to work 10 days after my dad’s funeral, six weeks after he died and at first and was dreading it but at the same time was keen to get back into a sort of routine, the new “normal”. Im so glad i did because for a few hours it took my mind off thinking about my dad. Good luck with your first day back x

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Thats exactly how i feel, keen but at the same time feel like not turning up. All i can do is try and if i fond it too much, I can leave. x

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Anxiety plays around in our lives alot especially after we loss someone, so finding our inner lion can help, as they say courage and being courageous helps and getting up and going back to work is the first step. So pick yourself up, brush yourself down and give it a go. Good luck, I hope it all goes well for you.

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I went back to work after my dads funeral so was about 10 days. Being at home just gave me too much thinking time. Being back at work I get less thinking time however the pain and sadness is still the same I am sure because it hurts so so much.
I have had my moments at work where I have become overwhelmed and have removed myself from the office for 5 minutes. I cannot imagine what I would’ve been like without trying to have some sort of focus.
My sadness is also for everyone else in my family too.
Just seems to be one thing after another my mum lost her husband of over 50 years, then had her car taken off her because it was a motability car although she is also disabled. Then her landlord has asked her to move out of the home she has lived in for 10 years and where my dad went to sleep for the final time. She is so so low too and it is also the realisation that she is all I have left too.

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I’ve found thats using a calendar and planning your days a head is a great way to achieve things and to help make positive steps again. It takes your mind of all the grief and gives you targets to help build that mental strength, we some how loose after a bereavement.