My Dad❤️

[Chellex]

On the 12th of December my dad passed away. On the 9th my dad collapse at home in which he was rushed to hospital and he was diagnosed with a brain tumor which my dad and us didn’t even know he had, He never woke up and was kept sedated until the 12th. On the 10th they performed brain surgery on him to remove it but it had caused too much damage to his brain. He couldn’t breathe for himself and was unresponsive to all the tests. We were told in the afternoon on the 10th that he wasn’t going to make it.

My dad was a builder and he had just finished doing my sister’s extension on her house and me and my mum was staying there during the time he was in hospital. Everyday I woke up there I was so upset as I’d look round in the morning and be reminded by everything I saw as he had done it all.

Me and my dad were really close we even worked at the same company together. With him dying so suddenly and unexpectedly I don’t know how to deal with my feelings. I feel so lost and helpless. I would do anything to bring him back, I wish this was all just a dream and I’d see him when I go to my mums house like I always did. My dad was a very loving person who was always my rock whenever I needed him, we were so alike and I always felt safe as he’d make everything feel okay. I miss him so much. When I was in the hospital I just wanted to phone him and tell me everything was going to be okay but we were in the hospital for him which my mind couldn’t get to grips with.

I’m worried I’ll never be able to accept that he’s not here and how I’ll be able to cope with this feeling.

My dad was only 48 years old and I am his youngest daughter 22.

Also the other day I was thinking about how I’m the youngest in my closest family and the thoughts of how if everything works out the way it’s supposed to that I’m going to lose everyone who I love so much before I go and I don’t know if I’d be able to take all that heartbreak. Has anyone else had this feeling?

Thankyou

[Lizzie21]

I’m sorry for your loss, you’ve had a very traumatic experience and it will take time to process everything that has happened. I lost my mum on 20th November this year and I go through days where I feel numb and it’s like it hasn’t happened/isn’t real; I would give anything to hold her hand or hug her. Your feelings are completely normal, the only advice I can offer is to try and talk about your feelings when you are ready with someone that will listen. Worrying about loosing other family members is normal too (I felt like this when my dad died, I was 13 and he was 42), to focus on spending quality time together, the anxiety will fade with time (although I know it won’t feel like that at the moment). Hugs and best wishes x

[Chellex]

Thank you, sorry for your loss. The world can be so cruel. Xx

[Burgled]

My heart breaks for you: you’re 17 years younger than me. My advice is to come together as a family and look after each other. I’ve been staying at my mum’s since my dad went into hospital, and hugging her gives me so much comfort (I’m not sure how she feels about it, though ).

[Jas2]

I really relate to the worry about losing other people the same way as the youngest in the family. I lost my Dad aged 55 on December 4th. It was sudden. I’m 30. It must sound loads older as you are so young, but I feel like a child right now. I also feel angry that I now know how it feels to lose a parent and will have to know this feeling all my life, rather than others who lose parents older. Which I know is irrational. I also keep looking at old men and just wanting to cry because I’ll never know what my dad would look like as an old man. I hope it gets easier for us.