Hi, I’m new to this group so forgive me if I ramble. My eldest daughter lost her battle with cancer 30th July this year on my granddaughters 2nd birthday. She was my grandaughters aunty and she was her world. My daughter had crohns since the age of 15 and when she began complaining to her colorectal tea that something was not right and it was different to her usual symptoms, they just threw medication at her. It took eighteen months for them to listen to her requests for investigations into her pains and was eventually told she had cancer and it was spreading. My grief for my daughter is marred by the anger that I feel that she was not listened to until it was too late. And I am struggling to process it and don’t know how to move forward.
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Hello @Joanne65,
I can see that you’re new to the community. I hope you find it to be a support to you, but I am so sorry for the loss of your daughter that brings you here.
Sadly, you’re not alone. We have a Losing a child section, where you can connect with other bereaved parents and family members who will understand some of what you’re going through.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support. In the meantime, these resources may help you right now.
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Child Bereavement UK support families with the loss of a child. They also support bereaved children. You can call their helpline on 0800 02 888 40.
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The Compassionate Friends support families who have lost a child of any age. They have a grief companion scheme where you can get 1-1 support from another bereaved parent. You can call them on 0345 123 2304.
Sue Ryder also has some resources which can help you cope with grief.
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Our Grief Guide self-help platform which has information, resources and advice to help you through your grief
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Our Bereavement Information pages which can walk you through what you are going through.
If you would like to make a complaint about your daughter’s treatment, this page outlines what steps to go through. You don’t have to do this alone - you can get the support of an advocate to help you. The Voiceability website explains more about how can advocate can support you in making a complaint.
Take good care and keep reaching out,
Seaneen
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I think there is a lot like you, think the same thing. The medical profession tends to not listen a lot of times. I know when my son age 47 who had mild cerebral palsy and mild learning disability, started to complain of pain in his spine and hip. He went to a walk in centre they said muscular rub deep heat in . I pushed for Physio, I went with him for assessment, the physio said muscular and there was a three months waiting list.
He had secondary bone cancer he died within three months.
I am so sorry to read your story. It just adds to the grief, knowing they weren’t listened to just because they assume it relates to already ongoing issues.