My gran was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in December of 2019, shortly after we went into lockdown and I saw very little of her as she went through many rounds of chemo. It broke my heart that I couldn’t be with her in her time of need after she spent the past 18 years so close to me, even though we live so far away from each other.
As time went on she remained optimistic but things took a turn for the worst as 2022 rolled around and her condition has declined rapidly. It began with a twitch in her eye, then seizures, then they confirmed the worst about a month ago that the cancer had metastasised in her brain and had become terminal.
It was then that she began to give up. I have seen her once since then as my work will not let me have time off (I don’t understand why they won’t level with me in these unique circumstances)
She is now unable to eat, walk or breathe properly and has been re admitted to hospital this evening. She has been referred to a hospice which truly has confirmed the end is nearby and I have not properly come to terms with this. I’m going to visit tomorrow but I simply don’t know how to react and want to make the most of my time with her because I don’t think I’ll get to see her again after that. It absolutely breaks my heart and I really don’t know what to do.
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My heart goes out to you . I was with my husband as he took his last breath it’s not easy mate in fact it’s the hardest thing I have ever experienced and I don’t want to ever go through that again. But you have to put aside your anguish and just try to be positive to your gran tell her it’s OK and you love her so much . You will be glad you did after she’s gone then you can grieve. Let your gran go knowing you are going to be ok and thank her for everything she’s ever done for you and you are so proud shes your gran. Take care and all the best mate I’ll be thinking of you tomorrow xx
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