My husband, Bruno, died suddenly four years ago. I have remained in close touch with some of his former co-workers in the nonprofit organization where he worked. All the co-workers and even the volunteers loved him and appreciated his sense of humor–they loved both of us as a couple. They still talk about him (through emails and texts). Now they have invited me to a summer fundraiser, which is also celebrating the 25th work anniversary of one of his co-workers to whom he was especially close–and to whom I am as well (mostly through emails). There was a required donation, which I paid, and there will be food, entertainment, and open bar at a place they and Bruno often went. I just now thought about whether I should also bring her a personal gift. I want to honor her to show my gratitude for how much she has kept in contact with me, especially in the first few years–and also to bring in Bruno’s presence. I am sure he will be there in spirit and maybe my presence is enough. But still, I am wondering! Any ideas? The event is tomorrow, June 29th. I still would appreciate any advice, even if later.
@AnneandBruno
What a lovely story. Thank you. For sharing it with us.
I hope you have a lovely time today (29th). I’m sure it will be emotional for you.
As to gifts , the first thing that comes to my mind is whether you have any old photos of your husband from when he worked there, even better, if this particular co-worker is in one with your husband. That you could put in a nice frame?
Lots of love on a special day for you all
Big hugs 
I want to add to my note about Bruno’s co-workers. I didn’t mention in that post another aspect that is part of my life now since his death four years ago. I didn’t mention it because i wanted to be brief and stick to the topic. The new aspect is shock.
Four years feels like four minutes. I feel like I am still in shock and that it hasn’t happened. I have not really cried–just a little at times. There are people in my life who do talk about Bruno all the time and others who never mention him–sadly disturbing to me.
What I do feel, though, is his presence and many signs.
I just found the thread that Emz started called “Signs”. I was so happy to find others who understand that our loved ones on The Other Side do send us signs. And some of you are still looking for signs. You will find see them!
I connected with Emz over his comment of sleeping on the sofa after her death. I have been doing that. Just can’t sleep in the bed.
There is a person, Laura Lynne Jackson, who is a psychic medium. She lives on Long Island in the USA and was a high school English teacher. She is married and has three children. My sister saw her in a panel on a program on TV. We have read her two books and zoomed in together on some of her recorded talks (did this during the pandemic).
Big takeaway is that she keeps saying we do not need her and that we can tune into our loved ones and see their signs ourselves. She is still the teacher and gives us ways to learn to understand the language of the universe. I am a theology teacher myself, so this resonates with my Catholic belief in the Communion of Saints.
You might like Laura’s books:
First one: The Light Between Us (a New York Times Best Seller)
Second: Signs: The Secret Language of the Universe. (Also a New York Times best seller)
Wishing everyone well! Thank you, Sue Ryder, for this wonderful vehicle. I don’t really l know how I got into this–maybe a little help from Bruno?
I will copy this post and add it to the thread entitled Signs.
Wow CathPhil, thank you! Actually I do have such a photo. Bruno had it on a shelf in our bedroom. I had taken it out earlier this evening, and was thinking of making a copy and putting it into a card for his co-worker. But the frame idea is perfect, I’ll bet she–and they–have this photo. It is if all of them wearing Santa hats at Christmas time. The organization is Make-a-Wish, so you can imagine the type of people who are part of this wonderful way of helping children with life-threatening illnesses. They are all special, and Bruno absolutely loved working with them-- as well as for the mission of MAW.
@AnneandBruno
What special people, do you are bound to have a special day. Love and hugs to you all for the wonderful things you do for others.
Thank you so much, CathPhil!! Your words have helped ease some of my emotional anxiety. In the morning, I will put that photo in a frame!
Love and hugs,
Just a word (or two!) of thanks to CathPhil and followup to my attendance a week ago at the 25th work anniversary of one of my husband Bruno’s former co-workers. Thanks for your advice. I did find a small frame for the group shot of his co-workers and gave it to the guest of honor as a gift beyond the donation to attend the event. She was very happy that I was there representing him in spirit!
It was an exceptional night as I met so many of Bruno’s co-workers and volunteers (this was a Make-a-Wish event) whom I had known from events we had attended together. They all had words of high praise and memories about him. One volunteer returned to me after we had been speaking. He came back excitedly saying "I didn’t know “who you were! My dad and I loved working with Bruno!” It was a treat for me to see again the fondness for him that was so evident. A former wish kid was there with her mother. She had had her wish granted 22 years ago when she was 11. She was so upset to learn that Bruno had passed.
As the night wore on, though, I found myself at times alone as different groups settled in together. I find this attending of events without my husband to be very disconcerting. I was thankful that I could be on my phone. Still I don’t quite know how to manage the single life and sorely miss being with Bruno, my best friend. Has anyone navigated this new experience after losing their spouse?