I have just got a phone call from the funeral home and I was told that the CD with my husband’s funeral will be delivered later in the afternoon. I am already crying my eyes out and I am not sure if I can watch it. On the other hand, it might bring me peace as having my beloved husband upstairs in our bedroom. I try to be strong but it is getting harder every day. Why did he leave me behind? Life is not worth living anymore without him. In three days it will be three months since he left me. I have no one to talk to because I have the impression - actually, I know - that my friends and neighbours are fed up with me and they have their own problems and worries. Life goes on for them but I am trapped in my grief. There is no hope.
6 Likes
I have a copy of my wife’s funeral saved to my computer. I tried to look but couldn’t see for tears. at some time in the future I may be ready but not yet as it’s only 2 weeks since the service. pop it somewhere safe and give yourself permission to wait until you’re ready, and permission in advance to stop if it becomes too much. I’m not even 4 weeks since she died in my arms and it’s the same. Hugs.
3 Likes
We had a recording of my husbands funeral. Everyone said it was the best they had been to. Some of the grandchildren had lits if questions so we asked if they wanted to watch it. My children and grandchildren watched ut together cast to the big tv. We laughed and we cried but overall it was a positive experience. We have tried to be as open with the little ones as possible and it does seem to help. They talk about him a lot. They wonder if he can see them and when we have some food they say things like ‘Damps liked this’. Every family is different but I’m glad we watched it again as we were all so numb on the actual day. X
3 Likes
@Annaessex i hope getting the CD brings you comfort rather than distress. Sending hugs.
I know that feeling of people being fed up of me. Apart from a few family members I get the same impression from family & friends. Even the few that are supportive I feel they are finding it a bit much although they are too kind to say. I’m stuck between backing off and telling them I’m ok and the fear of drowning in grief without their support.
2 Likes
@Freefaller that’s lovely how your grandchildren speak about your husband a lot. My grandchildren are completely different. They never mention my husband unless I do. I don’t push it because maybe it’s their way of coping. It’s really sad because they doted on him and him them.
4 Likes
This seems to be a new thing, we weren’t given the option & I often wish I’d had a recording of it as it all went by in a blur, but people said they’d never seen the church so packed & his coffin was very unique, the colours & emblem of our beloved Blackpool FC. Not sure if I’d have been able to watch it though but it would be there if I did.
3 Likes
it seems to have been set up during COVID. my wifes funeral was live streamed and family in Belgium the US and Norway plus some too old or fail to travel were all able to see it. it was just part of the undertakers package.
3 Likes
My partners funeral was online for a month and the I had a USB done , that came last week. Initial I watched it every night, it was something I needed to do. The USB however, has firmly stayed in the box. I cannot watch it and have no desire to. It’s going straight into his memory box. Maybe one day I will watch it but for now definitely not.
The other things that has changed for me. I used to watch videos and look at photos every night and they gave me comfort. Now I find it hard to look at them, with a clearer mind, they are too painful.
6 Likes
Hi @Annaessex , I have a copy saved on my PC of my husband’s funeral. He died during lockdown so we’re very limit to numbers at his funeral, the service was live streamed for those that had wanted to go but couldn’t.
I have watched it several times over the last 26 months, the last time was on our wedding anniversary in April, still can’t get through watching it without crying. But I’m glad I have it. I also watched our daughter’s wedding video the only recording I have of him and hearing his voice and that makes me cry too.
Debbie x
4 Likes