My Mother passed away on 10th December, her funeral is 6th January. We didnt have the best relationship and I am shocked at how hard this has hit me, I am racked with guilt, perhaps I should of tried harder to make her love me, could I have done more. I see her face as she lay in hospital, they rang me after she had died, she looked so afraid and yet she wanted to go she had been begging for weeks.
Sorry I am rambling,
Hi there Sandralynn,
I am so sorry for your loss. We expect parents to live forever.
No matter what type of relationship we have with our parents once they have died we experience regret, and many other emotions, this is grief. Grief and the period following the loss is a time to forgive them and yourself for the errors of the past. Parents are not perfect, nobody is perfect. When you were born you did not come with an instruction book! We are all individuals and each of us are different.
Forgive yourself and greive and allow yourself peace and comfort from this time. Your mother understood you better than anyone else. She forgave you your wrongs, she loved you always even when you didnt think she did.
Find peace in talking about her and your relationship.
Take care