Hi I recently lost my mum on the 19th April 2024,
We was so close always together and she was always around my children until around a year and a half ago. She had a really bad breakdown and wasn’t her self after that.
She was really poorly she had kidney failure for 17 years among other things.
The thing is I can’t cry I just feel emotionless. I can’t get myself to realise that this is real and she’s never coming back. I’m on sertraline 100mg could this be the reason I’m just so blank?
I absolutely adore my mum I just don’t understand why I’m not breaking down like my dad and other brother and sisters.
You’ve probably had such a shock, losing your mum, perhaps you’re just protecting yourself for now.
Please don’t judge yourself by the way other people grieve.
You will grieve in your own way, in whatever form that takes.
Make sure you look after yourself as best you can and keep dropping by here to talk and explore your emotions.
Take care…
Thank you for replying.
I just feel so confused with it all.
It’s like my brain won’t accept she’s gone, even though we watched her go, and I’m
Planning the funeral, I did her make up at the chapel with my sister. It’s like I’m looking at someone else and not mum. I keep expecting her to give me a ring and ask me to bring her some monster munch up to her it’s just really weird
I am sorry for your loss, Ik it must be really difficult to what you are going through, I am assuming the medicine you are taking is an SSRI and it is their job to block your emotions but I am not an expert, I remember taking an SSRI and when I couldn’t cry during griefing I was so uncomfortable and blank. I stopped it and trusted myself to get better naturally but you please continue and talk to your doctor about it. Life is unfair sometimes but she got to see your children which is a big thing. I am sure she must’ve been so proud of you and won’t like seeing you like this from up.
I am 26 and I lost my mom 6 months back, she won’t be there to even see my marriage or see me get forward in life, you know our birthdays are together, God took her when she didn’t have any illness and took her within 2 mins. Life is unfair at times. Yoga and meditation helps me get better in life so may be give it a go after a month or so. Take care of yourself and feel free to reach out to me if you want to talk
Hi there so sorry for your loss. I lost my mum in january and am still struggling.
Just wanted to say my husband is on sertraline and he is the same in terms of a fairly consistent emotion. Some would say emotionless! It may be part of the reason you feel a little numb as it is there to smooth over the highs and lows from what ive read.
That said - its all very fresh for you. I was still in shock for the first month with everything being arranged for the funeral etc.
Take care of yourself and just feel how you need to feel when you need to feel it. We are all different and it comes at different times.
I’m so sorry for your loss. You’ve basically said exactly the same things I’ve said about myself! It doesnt feel real, like youre talking about someone else, or looking at someone elses picture.
I’ve just put it down to the brain trying to protect us from hurt. The veil will lift at some point maybe, but for now, just trust that your body/brain is just protecting you. Which might also be why you aren’t crying much - but I also have friends on Setraline that say it makes them feel a little numb in general?
Everyone reacts and behaves differently in grief, theres no set of rules to say you must feel a certain way - also as someone else has said, shock has a big part to play.
So sorry for your loss. 100 mg is a fairly high dose, so it’s likely it contributes to the feeling of numbness. But crying (or not crying) isn’t a measure of how much you love or grieve for someone either, everyone reacts differently. The not being able to process that she’s gone is natural, we’ve all been or are there, I think.
Hi Charlottesheff123
Im so sorry for your loss.I lost my mum just over 3 years ago.I think everyones experience of grief is different.Its still so raw and painful and it probably still feels so surreal.It just turns your life upside down.Even though you haven’t cried thats ok.Dont think there’s anything wrong with you because there isnt.You are probably still numb.
This is just my experience of sertraline but i take the same dose and i really find it hard to cry,before taking setraline i use to be able to cry so i can understand why you feel like it could be that.Hope this helps a bit.Try to be kind to yourself you are going through a huge shock.
Hi there. I’m so sorry about your loss.
When my mother passed I was also on 100mg of sertraline.
It made me feel very numb and emotionless, and then made me feel guilty for not being able to feel upset about the death. I was confused and frustrated. I understand you.
I talked to my doctor and stopped taking them, I trusted myself and my emotions started to come back slowly. I think you’re still in shock, everyone feels and grieves in different ways, including not being upset or crying, so do not blame yourself. Give yourself time and be gentle to yourself
Everyone deals with grief differently, it takes time to sink in, my mums been gone 6 months tomorrow and I still can’t accept she’s gone I mean I know she’s gone but I can’t accept I won’t see her again. My mum was only 64 and had been poorly but she came home and me my dad and my sister had 17 days with her until she passed away in mine and my sisters arms.
I’ve cried buckets but there’s days I don’t cry at all and I feel guilty for not crying but it’s you just adjusting. Maybe at the funeral you’ll cry and I’m on citalopram so I don’t believe it’s the tablets but don’t beat yourself up about not crying it will come just let time take it’s course, I wish you all the best.
it’s just really weird
