Hello Im new here and feeling very overwhelmed. My sister who was 13 years older than me fell asleep in may 2020 and didnt wake up. She had an embolism. The shock was tremendous and as it was during covid, we were unable to have a proper funeral. I cant get over the shock as we spoke every day! Last November, my next sister up passed away after a 3 year fight with dementia. Although it wasnt a shock, it was still a traumatic time for all of us.
I feel detached from everything and cant seem to get past the shock of my first sister. Mostly I put on a brave face but inside I feel broken. Is this normal?
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Hello @Douglas1960,
Thank you for reaching out. I’m so sorry for the loss of your sisters. It sounds like you barely had time to process the loss of one sister before losing another, and it’s no wonder you’re still in shock.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but in the meantime, you may find these Sue Ryder resources helpful as you cope with the death of your siblings.
- Our Losing a sibling support page
- Our Grief Guide self-help platform which has information, resources and advice to help you through your grief
- Our Grief Coach text service, which sends you personalised text support via SMS
- Our free Online Bereavement Counselling which is held via video chat
- Our Bereavement Information pages which can walk you through what you are going through
Take good care - you are not alone.
Seaneen
Thank you so much for your message.
I will spend some time reading through the topics
Hi, firstly I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your sisters, its so hard to accept and deal with. I lost my only sister to sepsis exactly a year ago and the pain is still unbearable so I understand how you feel.
I think our siblings are the biggest link to our childhood we can ever have and we always think they are always going to be in our lives. The shock is devastating when they leave us and its so hard to accept. I also put on a brave face to the world but this group is a place where I can be honest and reach out. I hope you too find comfort here, you are not alone in your grief.
Sending love and strength to you
Janine
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Hello Janine
Thank you for your lovely message and so sorry to hear about your sister.
Its an ongoing emptiness that never quite leaves as I think of all the things we had planned together. I’m sure you must feel the same. And I worry my sister who passed suddenly was in pain and frightened and just didnt pick up the phone as it was during lockdown.
The ifs are terrible but I know its my mind I have to control.
Im pleased I have found this safe place on here . Thank you again Lesley
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I am so sorry to hear about the loss of both your sisters. That must be so hard for you. I lost my only sister 2 1/2 years ago and it is still really hard. I think about her all the time and still shed a tear or two most days. Like most other people here admit we put on a brave face as that seems to be what’s expected but privately we weep.
I hope that you find some of the support you need in joining this group.
Take care