My son was stillborn

Hi, I lost my son on the 31.10.2016 and am finding it hard to come to terms with it, although I have support from friends and family I feel so alone in dealing with my loss. The dad lives far and although we are not together he tries to support me through messages but is always saying life must go on which just upsets me even more as it’s only been 2 months. I have two beautiful boys which keep me going through most days but when they are not here I feel lost and don’t no what to do with myself, some days I pretend nothing has happened and can’t even cry and then other days it’s just too much… Is this normal?

Hi Sparkle,

Welcome to the Online Community. I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your son and how alone you are feeling. While I’m sure your dad has good intentions, it is a shame that he said something so unhelpful. Your grief is very natural and you need to have a chance to grieve and not feel any pressure to ‘move on’.

I would recommend you check out Sands (020 7436 5881 or helpline@uk-sands.org), which is an organisation offering lots of support to people who have lost a baby, including a helpline, local groups and an online forum.

Here on the Sue Ryder Online Community, you will also find lots of supportive people who have experienced bereavement of all kinds. I hope you will get some more replies from our users soon. In the meantime, you may want to read and reply to this post from a user called c.l95, who lost his baby son two years ago: https://support.sueryder.org/community/coping-death-loved-one/i-dont-know-how-deal-death-my-son

Thank you for the reply, I just feel as if he does not care for the loss of our son especially when he refers to the situation as spilt milk… Thanks for the advise on the support groups based in my area I definitely think I need the support x

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