My Stepdad :(

Hi Everyone,
My Stepdad passed away on 16th June, I looked after him the last 3 weeks of his illness, I have been staying with my Mum & Stepdad since April as Mum is Bedridden & cannot do anything for herself…
Mum & Stepdad we’re married for 46 years & it’s hit her so hard, she’s crying non stop & sometimes hysterical, I organised my stepdads funeral & had his ashes returned to Mum, I also had his funeral put onto dvd for her to keep as she couldn’t attend…
I’m still looking after Mum but it’s getting harder & harder to cope by myself, she absolutely worshipped him, I just don’t know what to do next!..
Has anyone got any Advice please? Mum will not have Carers in to look after her…

1 Like

Is there no other family or friends who could help to give you a break and some space to grieve xx

1 Like

Hi, sorry for the loss of your stepdad and the difficult situation with your Mum. It’s so very hard when a loved one refuses support from outside of family. However sometimes you need to put your own long term needs first, because otherwise you leave yourself vulnerable. Perhaps you can reach out to other family members or friends for support? If not, it sounds like you might need to access some social care for the interests of everyone. Best wishes, take care xx

1 Like

Thankyou for your Reply, Mum had 5 Children but since February 3 of them haven’t been in touch with Mum & never came to stepdads funeral, ive only got my younger brother & he works full time :frowning:

Try reaching out to them asking them for help? Or maybe as your brother for help on a day off? Or tell him how much you’re struggling see if he can put a few days holiday in?
If you don’t take a break and grieve you’ll crash and burn then who’s going to be there for her then
Maybe tell mum that and say 2 days with carers and then I’ll be here see how it goes

Thankyou, it’s been an absolute nightmare, I don’t have any other family, I have 3 brothers & a sister but they haven’t bothered with Mum since February time…only my younger brother pops up on a weekend,
I’m waiting to go into hospital for an operation so I’m really panicking who’s going to look after Mum?
Yes I think I’m going to have to speak to Adult Social Care & see if they can help, xx