My wife passed away from either primary or sec liver cancer

My wife died of liver cancer or possibly another primary cancer and secondary liver cancer on the 27th Dec. I so miss her and wish I had been there when she passed, but i left the room for an hour to do some housework and when I returned she had gone. So many things i wanted to say to her, but I can’t.


Stephen, I am so sorry that your wife had to leave. I think so many of us on this site would love to have those last few hours again and be able to express all those thoughts that we never put into words. I also feel that people pas when the time is ‘just’ right, were that is when they are alone it when certain people are present. I don’t think it’s something we actually chose and I have known people say we only went to the door and turned back and it was to late. May be she didn’t want you to be more upset. Life is so very different when our special person leaves us and it takes time to deal with the new life, take it slowly and in time you can look back and feel proud that you have managed as well as you have. Stephen, look after yourself, she would want you to be brave. S xx

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You can still talk to her Stephen. You could write her a letter, or write everything you want to say to her in a journal.

Writing everything down and rereading it will help you.

I still talk to my husband every day. I talk to his photo’s. It does help.

I’m so sorry you lost your dear wife, it’s devastating, but the people on this site do understand how you feel.

Take care

I have so much regret that the wonderful marriage we started off with drifted and kids came along. I was not the focus any more. I could and should have been a better husband. My wife at times could have been a better wife. But we stuck together for 38 years. I have bawled my eyes out that I was not better. I certainly was not bad. She said in the last few months as I cared for her and helped wash her etc, that “I had come good” . I so much miss her, three weeks to the day after her passing. When will I feel better and have just a little less grief?

Stephen, it does get easier but never goes away. She is part of you and we wouldn’t want them to go completely from us. It takes time but please remember the good memories, those are the ones that matter. Holder her close but also remember you have to continue with life because it doesn’t stop even when we want it to. Look after yourself and take care. S xx


Three weeks is such a very short time Stephen.
Some days you will cry less and feel a little better perhaps, but you’ll always carry the grief…it would be impossible not to after 38 years, which is a lifetime.
Everyone has ups & downs (especially after 38 years) and you were together & loved each other. Please don’t beat yourself up thar you could both have been better.
You carry such grief BECAUSE you shared love for such a long time.
Grief is the price we pay for love.

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