My wife’s funeral and after

My Karen’s funeral was on Wednesday this week, thank you for all the messages before the funeral they helped greatly, the service went well then a few close friends cam back home for sandwiches etc. now on Friday the feelings of loss and loneliness are all but overwhelming I try to remember the happy times we had, there were plenty of them as we were together for forty years but all I can see is Karen in hospital then a nursing home where she passed away on 1st May


Dear Pete

Thank you for sharing your feelings. The come down once a funeral is done after all the build up beforehand is something we don’t hear much about. But it’s all too real. The realisation of this and the ‘what now’ feelings can be overwhelming.

I’m so sorry you lost your Karen, and that your last memories are all you can see right now. It will take time Pete and all I can offer is that you speak to people on here who know just what you are going through and will go through. Hard though it is, try and reach out to friends and family and those of us here. Many people go away after a funeral, a change of scenery can be very helpful.

My thoughts and sympathies are with you.


Hi Pete47 my heart goes out to you I know exactly how your feeling since your loss was only shortly after my loss of my hubby Barrie on 26th April, everything just hurts both mentally and physically, were busy trying to get everything organised for their ‘send off’ so our minds are distracted to an extent, afterwards you feel flat, well I do, I try to make a list of ‘must do’ tasks to keep my hands and mind busy, but it doesn’t always work, some days I just don’t want to get out of bed, some days I haven’t, my family and friends keep asking me if I’ve eaten, I tell them I have when I haven’t, I know I should, I tell myself ok it’s only cheese and biscuits but it’s food isn’t it?
I still have a board full of Barrie’s photos that we put up at home full of fun memories, I stand and look at it some days and may even smile at one or two of them but then the tears start to flow again.
We are all here in this place for the same reason, we maybe at different stages but we have or are going through it in 1 way or another, I have even found me telling myself off and say stop doing that, your only making it worse for yourself, but still do it anyway, it’s like self torture but I can’t help it.