Hi my name is Sue, in March 2019 We lost our mam, my Husband Ian was my rock, then 3 months later my Ian suddenly passed just before our retirement,We had so many plans what We would do after working 50 years, I feel so broken and cry myself to sleep most nights. I now live on my own my children have been brilliant but life goes on for them, how can i carry on.
life seems so cruel sometimes i feel as if i can not go on people say to me i have been so strong but underneath i am falling apart.
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Hi Sue,
So sorry for your losses, it’s so hard to get through each day knowing our lives have changed.
This site has been a life saver for me and I couldn’t of got through without it. I lost my husband coming up to a year next month. It’s a comfort to talk to people in the same position and with the same feelings who just know.
We feel like we’re the only ones on the world suffering this pain and realise we’re not.
Stick with us all on here, there’s some lovely people to talk to and it will help you so much.
Steph x
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Thank you Steph for your kind words, and i will start reading peoples life stories we are all grieving so will help each other thank you .
Hi Sue I know just how you are feeling, I lost my Mel in April and I have had wonderful support from family and friends, but at the end of the day their lives move on, as they should and we are just stuck with our sadness and loneliness. But we must take hope from the lovely supportive people on here, who assure us gradually we will, very slowly, move forward, then probably fall back again but keep strong keep getting up each morning try to make a plan of what to do and just keep going. Sending love Chris x
Hi Sue I totally understand your feelings I lots my Rob in September if this year very suddenly and it turned my world upside down . Like you my two kids have their own lives to lead and they also need the space to grieve . I have found a lot of comfort talking to people on here about my feelings and reading theirs makes you realise your not alone . Please keep chatting on here as it’s been said before everyone in here is respectful of each other and we are all going through the same process ok it may differ with each individual but at the same time we are all grieving a loved one . Keep smiling, stay safe & strong x x
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Yes Chrissie, it’s two steps forward and one back. There will be times we feel hopelessly lost, others when some little hope appears. We fasten on to that only to have our hopes dashed. But yes, it does improve slowly and imperceptibly. It can’t be rushed. It will still take as long as it takes. But keep your eyes on that distant light. It’s elusive at first and comes and goes, but it does get brighter. Our loved one’s would not want us suffering. It’s inevitable that we will, but it is said if we are miserable so are they.
Putting on a ‘brave face’ when we are in turmoil inside is not easy. But if we are permanently miserable and negative we will surely push those away who can help us. Not easy, none of it is, but hope is always there, hidden but never lost.
Sending Blessings. John.
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Thank you Chrissie they say time is a healer x
Thank you Kazzer, I do know things will get better and it is good to talk because i have been keeping every thing inside not wanting to upset any one xx
Hi Sue,
I am so sorry that you have found yourself needing this site but hopefully it will help you through the most lonely of experiences.
Like you my husband died very suddenly. My father had died five months earlier following a fall and my mum was ill in the aftermath. Amidst our grief my husband was our absolute strength and support across the generations. He propped us all up and when he died I lost not just the love of my life but the centre of my universe.
The effect of such a loss is impossible to explain but on this site we don’t need to. We all know the impact. Here we can discuss concerns that we keep from other family members for fear of adding to their distress. In my loneliest of moments the friends I have engaged with on here have been a lifeline. I hope it will be the same for you. X
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Thank you Jobar, I am so sorry for your loss also, it is a very tough time for us all. Thank you once again and take care.
Hi Sue -so many emotions come and go and its like we become two people, the coping getting on with things person to deal with the outside world and the broken devastated inner person that we can be in the safety of our home. Some days I feel I can cope and other days I just don’t want to —its so exhausting isn’t it. Its good that we can come to this site and be with others that understand x
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Hi Sue yes very true , So glad i have come onto this site we have to stay strong and help each other. Thank you Sue x