Hi- finding this site seems timely as I had an e-mail from my son this morning. He says he is still struggling with his dad’s death over a year ago.
I am very frustrated how little help he is getting, he seems very depressed and I don’t really know how best to help him.
So far, I have had zero response from elsewhere although I have been getting counselling for myself.
I would love to speak to other dealing with supporting adult children through bereavement as I find this particular need is often overlooked. Particularly when their is more than one child involved and their experiences are very different.
I am glad I found this site and hope there is someone out there who understand what I’m going through.
I’m sorry to hear that your son is struggling to come to terms with his Dad’s death, it must be a very hard time for both of you, and I can hear in your message how much you love and care for him.
We have people on this forum who have lost a parent, and others who have lost partners and are are supporting adult children through bereavement, I’m sure there will be someone who will be able to share their experience with you.
If your son would be interested in bereavement counselling, Sue Ryder offers an online service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so he could attend from home. There’s more information about this service here: www.sueryder.org/counselling.
Hi passerby im 35 and lost my dad 11 months ago its the hardest thing losing a parent you feel guikty angry etc i feel alone to no help and dont no where to start to look for it! Just found this forum today hope you all ok as can be all here to help eachother x
Feel free to talk to me. I will do my best to help.
Why do you think you feel guilty about your father’s death? Guilt is a common and understandable feature of grief. My dad has been gone 35 years and I still feel guilty sometimes. He died too young.
Thank you its guilt like eating the things he loves ans going places like he csnt go and would’ve loved to things like that guilt is a big part of grief isn’t it
Yes it is. You are right, but if you think of him every time you eat those things and are grateful that you are alive to enjoy them I think it becomes an act of love. I don’t go swimming much because of Covid, but when I do swim I always think of my dad. It is such a happy memory because he helped me learning to swim and he loved swimming. I feel him swimming with me. My siblings and I speak about him a lot, we can’t bring him back but we can still do the things he enjoyed and be grateful for his life. If there was no love there would be no guilt. Your dad wouldn’t want you to be unhappy. At sometime he lost a parent, too. It is the cycle of life.
Passerby thank u so much its true he such a kind loving person he would want his kids be happy for sure its nice remembering just hard at same time its a year next month hows your son doing now
My son is a mess for many reasons-but I may get to see him tomorrow which will be the first time in months. At least he’s speaking to me, however long it lasts.
it is everyone needs to talk
hows your son doing now