New relationship

18 months on from losing my fiancee to cancer I’ve started a new relationship, she asked me out and she knows my past and she knows I’m still grieving but she is prepared nature take its course.

How have other people managed having a new relationship and intertwining your past life with your new one?

I’ve told my new GF that my late fiancee will never be forgotten about and she will always be referred to as my late fiancee and never ever an ex.


Hi John. You will know when you are ready. My father looked after my mother with a brain tumour for six months, she passed away and within four months he met someone else . Three years later he remarried and he has just celebrated his second silver anniversary. My husband passed away in April and I don’t think it is something I can even think of. I do think age has a lot to do with it. I’m 64, I don’t think it is realistic to think I could ever find someone who could be my best friend again. Only you will know when it is right for you.


John, enjoy your new friendship but take it steady, don’t rush. Make sure that you are going into a new relationship for all the right reasons.
My mother re-married three years after losing my dad who had been the only man in her life. She had another thirty years of happy marriage.
I know I would be a nightmare for anyone else, I’m with Montague on this, certainly the wrong age to think about another relationship. I would be a nightmare as too set in my ways. Could never consider anyone that drank excessively, smoked or overweight as I go to the gym, walk, love gardening and eat healthily myself.
I married for the second time for all the wrong reasons. I wanted security for my young children. I foolishly thought I could make it work. It was a nightmare and I was so relieved when it ended. Marriage was definitely out for me after that, then I met my husband a few years later and knew it was right for me straight away. You will have no doubts. Good luck

I think it’s great that you have someone in your life. I wish you the best possible outcome for you and your GF. Life is short and precious, your previous relationship will never be forgotten but you are aloud to be happy and find love again, take things one day at a time and you will know if it’s right.
D x


I cannot envisage my marrying again, at the age of 80, I am very unlikely to. I cannot imagine taking up with someone who isn’t my Stan, anyone who does find happiness again, I say “good luck”.