New to all this

I lost the love if my life very suddenly on the 26th February this year, I had to do CPR on him it was so hard. Now I feel guilty, did I do it right was there anything else I could of done, what if!
Now due to health problems I’m having to move, part of me feels like I’ll be leaving him behind. We were supposed to moving together so I feel guilty that I’m getting everything We wanted, ground floor flat with a small garden.
I have a wonderful family but feel so alone all the time, I fight back my tears everytime someone talks about you. Will this feeling of loneliness ever go away!
I love my family very much but I’m very very close to the edge and I’m so so scared. I just want to close my eyes and never wake up. Sorry to rattle on, but if you’ve read it then thank you for taking the time to read it


Hi Audrey,

I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your partner. It sounds as though things are incredibly tough for you right now and you are feeling really overwhelmed.

It sounds like you’re looking for support and I’m glad that you’ve been able to talk about how you’re feeling here. There is lots of other support out there, and I would really encourage you to reach out and speak to someone about how you are feeling.

  • Samaritans ( are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.

  • Shout ( are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text SHOUT to 85258 and talk to them about anything.

  • You can also find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline (Where to get urgent help for mental health - NHS).

  • If you are at risk of harming yourself, please call 999 or contact your GP for an emergency appointment immediately.

Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here:

You can also make an appointment with your GP and ask to be referred to counselling or other support services in your area.

You deserve care and support so please, Audrey, get in touch with one of these services.

Take care,


Thank you Michelle
I’ll take a look