To everyone who visits here, those who are just starting out on their journey and those who feel as if they have been trudging along for ever, I just wanted to tell you that, although your name wasn’t on any list, you have just acquired your very own New Year’s Honour…it’s not one that any of us ever wanted and we won’t be showing it off or going to collect it at some fancy ceremony…but each one of us…and all our fellow travellers across the world…have earned this honour almost in spite of ourselves. We haven’t given up, we have done the best we can given our own unique circumstances, we have cried and dried our tears and taken wobbly steps into a future we never wanted …and we have done it all not for ourselves but to honour those whom we have lost…to carry their memory with us always and to make them as proud as we can of our efforts.
We live in uncertain times but we can be certain of this…we were blessed to be loved and that love will never die.
I hope that the “new” year ahead will give all of us fresh hope in our hearts and renewed strength to go on.
God bless…Take care x
That’s so lovely, thank you xx
Thanks for your lovely post. I find new year far more difficult than Xmas, it’s hard to look forward to planning out the next months, when all you really want to do is go back in time. But I have a milestone birthday this year and my son will be celebrating his 21st, so I am really trying to find someway to celebrate and stay positive, even though I know we will really feel Mark’s absence no matter what we do. Wishing peace and hope to you all xx
Thank you AG. That was the kick up the backside I needed today. Been feeling sorry for myself and that’s never a good idea. Yes, we were blessed to be loved and to love. xx
Beautiful, thank you.
Absolutely beautiful thankyou xx
So beautifully said thank best wishes zoe x
Hi Amelie, what for an uplifting post for the New Year, which we are starting without our loved one. The thought of carrying on despite everything for the memories of the person we lost, kept me going. It is such a difficult journey to grieve. Pushing me sometimes to my limits, forcing me to my knees, humbling me. I feel a glimmer of hope in my heart with the start of the New Year. I acknowledge that the sadnesses, suffering and shock of past events will never go away completely. Hopefully though there will be longer days soon, spring eventually, bird song. Healing is possible, I firmly believe that and the future will become clearer. One day one can make plans again. Until then, please all carry on and don’t lose hope even in the darkest of moments. They will pass. Be patient with yourselves. I reach out to all of you having to come to terms.
What a lovely thought
Thank you …lovely words……it’s coming up to 10 months this Wednesday since I lost my hubby ….I got through Christmas ok with my family and my brand new great grand son …but New Year’s Eve was hell …I didn’t want to say goodbye to the year I lost Roy it felt traitorous….New Years day I just felt so bereft and it’s really hit me hard since….xxx
Hi Saffy.
I too felt bereft on New Years Day. I lost my beautiful husband to cancer at the end of November 2021. He had been diagnosed in June 2020 and was already too unwell to have any treatment. We were told that he only had 6 months and I was so happy that we were still together for Christmas and New Year 2020. From October he deteriorated rapidly and died on 23 November 2021 . He died in the local hospice and we both desperately wanted him to be at home. I feel so sad and keep telling him I am sorry that he wasn’t at home. When he went into the hospice he was heavily sedated and could not speak to me but did occasionally open his eyes. I carried on chatting to him even though he didn’t respond. He died during the early hours and I was not with him. My heart is completely broken. I dreaded Christmas and New Year, however, I managed to get through it with love and support from family and friends. Come New Years Day it seemed such a long time since he was with me as in my head he died last year, not 6 weeks ago. I keep going but each day is hard and I spend a lot of time crying. I too have a lovely new grandson and my family and friends are my reason to keep going. I hope that the year gets better for you. xx
Thank you Lady11 ……I’ve struggled since New Year’s Eve….I’ve read peoples messages since I lost Roy last March and felt guilty as I seem to be coping and wondered why I wasn’t in bits and pain…now I realise I was in shock but New Year’s Eve hit me and hasn’t left…it’s 10 months and know the day is creeping up when I lost him …hope you are doing ok and stay safe .xx
Hi Saffy, new year is an awful time, the thought of starting a a year without them, a year they won’t know about, it’s so depressing. Last year most of my energy went into supporting my son’s, they took losing their Dad very hard. So far this year I just feel lost, not sure what to do, my days off from work are the worst, I can’t get motivated to do much at all.
Hi Gilmar…….you hit the nail on the head……( a new year they won’t know about )I felt I didn’t want to leave the year I was last with him….and now waiting for the first year anniversary of losing him soon to be here …its also the 20th year of losing my 34 yr old son which still feels like yesterday…I’ve a first great grandchild …a beautiful boy who I adore and really helps me….he’s 6 months old but Roy didn’t meet him which breaks my heart….but strangely he’s split image of my lost son as a baby …hope all goes well with you xx
Thank you 
xxx
Thank you lovely uplifting words which gave me a real boost.
Jim4
Thank you for your message, I was in hospital over xmas and “new year”. The past few weeks have been terrible, even though, I have been seeing MH team. Losing Carol on 1st November, then her birthday 9th December, then xmas and new year, yes its been a really bad time. Its good being to read people’s thoughts on here, but I am heartbroken 
still, and know I have a long journey ahead. Thank you for being able to reach out and let me know im not alone with my thoughts and dark thoughts.