I read posts on here from people at various stages, newly bereaved, 6mths, 1yr, 2yr, etc but there actually is no stage, grief is grief. There is no escape, no wrong way, no right way. We can’t measure it on how others are on their journey as it’s unique to ourselves. Nobody can feel our emotions, let alone tell us how to deal with them. This is the scary part for many newly bereaved that believe after 2 or 3 years they will be coping better. This is not necessarily true or untrue. None of us can foresee the future, grief is not linear or on a timeline. If you can get out of bed and function then this is a positive. We also tend to forget that not only have we lost our partner but we are grieving the version of ourselves too that was also lost. We lost half of who we are. We lost our present, our future our whole existence has changed and only time, patience, self love and perseverance can help. I am 3 years on and grief has evolved , it’s still there, can still be painful, can still be heartbreaking , brings different challenges but I no longer fear it, as to me it is a neverending reminder of the great love I was blessed with for 50 plus years, grief is now a silent friend that I don’t need to explain to anyone or measure it in anyway. When it arises, in whatever way it does , I tell myself my heart is big enough for their love to forever reside there whilst I still get on with living my life. Nobody can see grief through another person’s eyes. It’s a testamony to your love alone
Hi @Ditom64,
Thank you so much for sharing this with the community 
I’m sure your words will bring comfort to others.
Take good care,
Alex
This is so true, each experience is so different.
I thank you for your account of how you are feeling, I am struggling, quite a lot, but still have a wonderful son and daughter at home, which helps greatly
So many people have no-one, and the loneliness must be daunting.
My husband died so unexpectedly at age fifty eight, he was not unwell or on any medication, the shock was unbelievable and unbearable, my life has been changed beyond recognition. It’s a hard journey that I am on, but your post offers some hope, that maybe one day I will feel better.
Thank you.
This is so true and thank you for expressing it so well. I am 4 years on and leading up to the anniversary of his death on 10th November and it is still so raw. We are changed by our grief and though I have supportive family and good friends and I have reached out to new experiences, as you say the grief is there with you every step of the way. Every emotion I feel whether it is sadness or happiness, is different to the way I used to be but life goes on and I will not waste the time I have left, whatever that may be .