No money..no life..no friends...drowning in grief..

Dear Jackie, that is just it, I am far from being able bodied, in fact I haven’t been out of our door since my return from hospital 10 days ago.
It is what it is as my beloved late brother used to say, how I miss him. I have become reconciled to the fact that I am housebound. I do not know what I would do without my computer, telephone and housebound library. I have a lot of friends who call me, I can’t say that it eases my grief, but in a way it does give me comfort knowing that they are concerned about my welfare. The Americans have a lovely saying “if you are given lemons in life, make lemonade”. I know it is hard to follow but I do try. I am no Polyanna, I have a temper but as I have grown older it hasn’t got the same fire in it. I do feel sorry that your grief is not easing, your lovely Richard was some fella to be grieved so sorely. I am concerned for you and I send you my love. Maybe it is because I am an old lady and I know that it will be a shorter time when I meet my beloved Stan. Take care, love. Blessings
MaryL

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Mary…
…my Richard being 5 to 6 years older than me i would often jovially rib him and call him " old man…" of course he knew my humour was harmless and never took offence but his answer back to me was that he never saw himself as old, well in his word, as long as he had his health he was not old whatever age he would have reached…As i have mentioned before, he believed he would be one of these car driving octogenarians - centenarians that we see on the tv documentaries about whether they should still be on the road or not…

… Oh i too am so so worried if this computer packs up, this is-was more Richard, well he paid for it, it did play up a couple of days ago, i had to call my only friend up from down the bottom, it really did get me down and depressed as this is my means to the outside world and for me ordering my delivery food van…As for the computer, we put batteries in the use, the keyboard, and yet still the mouse would not write on the screen, in the end we just switched it off and switched it on again, and to my relief it worked, i could write again…

Thank you for all your input…cant get anything from benefit office…bri and me not married…and i was working to pay bills…off work on sick pay…im going to sell house…buy camper van and travel…live what life i have left…gotta get out the house…or I’ll just rot away…going over and over what life we were going to have and all the maybe/if only/regrets off not being with bri in last six months more…i must live for him…xx

Pat…
…dont give up hope… things have a funny way of panning out…re, your financial situation…or your lack of it…

Jackie…

Jackie Good for you. If you don’t want medication don’t have it. Too many people saying what to do and if it goes against what we believe in, unless its something really necessary, then stick to your guns. Soon after Alan died I kept getting dizzy spells so he gave me some medication, although I explained that I thought it was because I wasn’t having enough to drink and when i started to take in more liquids I was ok. I too haven’t touched the tablets he gave me. Janet xx

My laptop packs up occasionally and if I take the batteries out for a few minutes then replace them it works again. xxx

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Hi Pat, I’m so sorry for your loss, I lost my Peter just 7wks ago and it’s hell. But believe me when I say tablets won’t help, you need to let you body and mind deal with your emotions and while on tablets you wont, I am in an unfortunate position that I’m very I’ll myself and the amounts of meds I take, keep me alive, when really I don’t want too, I look at the packet of sleeping pills I have and yes I do think let me finish it, but then I think of my darlings children whom I’m close too and the grandchildren and it would not be fair. Re the monies talk to step change they will help you, there’s more help out than you think. Take care stay safe xx