Not coping with grief and lonliness

Looking to the future
1

I thought I was starting to cope with grief and lonliness.Lost my husband 5 months ago having cared for him for two and a half years. Got through Christmas with difficulty
and today it has really hit me. I have cried on and off all day and feel so alone. We did everything together and until he became ill he took good care of me. I am sorry this sounds so pathetic but that is how I feel at the moment.
Love & Hugs

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Hi Grace you dont sound pathetic losing a loved one can hit you at any time ,The phrase how long is a piece of string certainly applies to you and everbody in this special club .Keep coming back and chat i do friend hug Colin

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Hi grace,it is still early days but is another shock to the system when we think we are coping and then cant.I lost my husband just over 2 months ago now it was very sudden he was my soul mate.I have been told that I was better a few weeks ago than I am now I guess this is going to happen to us from time to time as we have no control over grief.Big Hug to you to.xDebbie

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Hello Grace, you have been a carer for a relatively long time and I think it is going to take a while for your grief to show and work through. I was only a carer for a short time, some 3 months, and I find it so difficult to get those 3 months in proportion when I think of the 48 years we were together. It didn’t help that I was in denial from the moment of Helen’s, my wife’s, diagnosis but that is something I will have to live with. Yes you are going to have to give yourself time because he meant so much to you.

If you have tried counselling already but it didn’t work there is nothing to stop you trying again, it is not one strike and you are out. Even if we can’ see it now, I reckon we will rebuild our lives and at the foundation will be the love we had for our loved ones. As a start as someone from this site aptly said, be the person your loved one loved. Wishing you a peaceful night, Alan.

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Thank you Alan for your reply. As you rightly say time is of the essence. I haven’t tried councelling . Can’t decide if it would be helpful. Hopefully 2017 will be a more peaceful year.