Not coping with uncertainty

I lost my lovely dad 6 weeks ago :broken_heart:. Although living with cancer for some time, we just weren’t expecting nor were ready for his sudden deterioration and passing. Same time the pandemic happened. I was busy with the funeral, then lucky enough to be given a work opportunity to keep me focused on something. From the outside I think it looks like I’ve dealt well with things but truth is I’m scared to have too much time to think. Recently there was a frustrating situation with work involving lots of uncertainty and I ended up getting frustrated and annoyed with a manager now still same uncertainty and made everything awkward and may have blown the opportunity. I’m angry at the place, angry at myself, angry at everything I think. I believe it’s all down to too much uncertainty and not feeling anything is in my control. I know the whole country is going through all this uncertainty, and everyone here through grief on top. I guess my question is how can I get my tolerance and resilience back and start to feel somewhere bearable again? Any thoughts or suggestions would be much appreciated. Hugs to you all x

Hello @Struggling, I’m so sorry you lost your lovely Dad 6 weeks ago and are experiencing a lot of anger and confusion. It’ll be 6 months on Sunday since I lost my Dad who was my whole world. It was sudden and unexpected and I still find myself in shock of how I’ve made it this far.
In terms of your question, I’m afraid there’s no ‘quick fix’ or solutions really for anyone, there’s no guidebook on grief. It’s so personal to the individual and we just have to ride the grief train in whatever direction or speed it comes in. It’s good days followed by awful ones. If you’ve managed to eat decent and get a good sleep - you’re doing well. If you’re managing to get out everyday, you’re doing great. Grief is about small victories for me and in this lockdown that’s all we can do.

Sending love to you.


Hi Watt92,
Thank-you for your reply. I’m so sorry to see you are living with such a profound loss, having lost your dad too. Your words make alot of sense to me, and to recognize the small achievements as and when. Sending you much love too during this awful time x

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