Not sure Im coping

My mum passedaway really suddenly on 7th December. A few days later her only brother in Ireland passed away. I flew to dublin and escorted his coffin as the only surviving relative then came back and arranged my mums funeral. I’ve thrown myself into Christmas for the kids but know I still have to deal with all of her belongings .She was my best friend. I callex her twice a day, every day. Will I ever feel human again. Why am I not in a heap and how can I move on with the greiving process?

Hi Cathie and welcome to our Online Community. I’m so sorry for your losses…you really have had a huge amount to deal with in a short space of time including trying to do Christmas as usual for the sake of your family.

While you wait for some replies to your message, you might find it helpful to read and reply to some of the other conversations in this section of the community, to connect with some other people who have lost a parent.

Remember to look after yourself whilst you’re busy looking after everyone else…
take care

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Dear Cathie, you’ve had an awful lot to cope with in a just a couple of weeks. That amount of rushing around would take its toll even if you weren’t dealing with two bereavements.

I wouldn’t worry about not feeling human or not feeling you should be in a heap. You need time to get your head around things and you may be working on automatic pilot.

I don’t think there’s much you can do to move on. I think you just have to keep functioning and accept that whatever you feel day to day is normal. Don’t expect to much of yourself.

You sound to me like you were a very devoted daughter and I hope that’s some consolation to you.


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Thanks Marigold.

I keep reaching for the phone to tell her something the kids have done or to hear about her day. Can’t quite believe shes not there. I’m dreading the New Year and struggling to think about going through her things. I would never have went in her bag or purse and it feels really wrong to go through them now. My husband is really supportive and has offered to help but even that feels wrong. January is going to be difficult.

Thanks for your kind words. Just want to stop hurting.