Not well and just want my mum

I was told around mid last year that I have gallstones and my Mum was still here then and she would always ask me how I was and even accommodated everyone’s diet in the house to fit better to my situation. Once she died, my symptoms and experience with my gallstones just got worse and on new years day I ended up in hospital and I am still here now as I am seriously ill due to my liver suffering as a result of a blockage by one of the stones. I find myself lying in this hospital every night just crying and thinking about my Mum, how she would have been ringing me every 2 minutes, face timing me, bringing me bags full of fresh pjs etc. I have been feeling lonely since I lost my mum and since coming in here due to poor health I’ve never felt more isolated. Whenever I’m ill, my mum has always been there for me and she is what I found comfort in that everything would be okay because I had her, now that I don’t, I find myself worried and in desperate need of a sign from her. I know she will be watching over me through all of this, but I am just so scared about the future. Something which I never was when my Mum was here because she always made me feel strong.

Hello I totally get how you feel Charlotte It is lonely without the one we love beside us
My husband died in April 2020 from covid He had underlying health conditions and I was his carer for several years In 2018 I had to have a major op and my sister looked after him while I was in hospital but I knew he was still there for me
I’m now on the waiting list for an op on my varicose veins hopefully sometime this year and it is scary having to go for scans and tests on your own life has changed and it is hard I just try to keep going the best I can for my husbands sake
Take care and I hope you’re out of hospital soon
Christine x

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Dear Charlotte,
I am so sorry you find yourself in hospital, unwell and missing your mum. This may be a stupid question but are the nurses caring for you aware of your recent devastating loss? I know their priority will be to tend to your medical needs but given that you are grieving and naturally feeling so isolated this could affect your response to certain things. I know they are rushed off their feet but someone might just give you a little bit extra time for you to talk.
My elder son was in hospital almost two years ago following a burst appendix. He was really so unwell and my husband and I spent as much time as we could with him together with his then fiancée (now his wife).
I know how much our support meant to him and aided his recovery so I feel deeply how much you will be missing your mums care and attention.
My husband died suddenly a few months after our son had recovered and I too am only too aware of the difference it makes when our nearest dearest are with us to support us. We all got through so much together like most families and when that safety net is ripped away everything is so much scarier.
Your mum would always have wanted the best for you so keep thinking of that all the time. I do not underestimate how hard that is. Let the nurses know how you are feeling , don’t hold back. Thinking of you and hoping you feel better soon. Xx

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So sorry you are in hopsital not well its lovely that you and your mum were so close me and my mum are o dont know what i would do without her and cannot even imagine i know you want your wanting your mum.and i understand as you were close but do you have any siblings or close friends that could facetime while your in the hospital so you dont feel too lonely x
Ps get well soon x

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Thank you for your reply and well wishes. Thats exactly what it is yeah she was my safety net and always has been so going through all of this without her has been a lot harder. Some of the nurses are aware yes, in fact one of them also lost their mum when they were in their early 20s too so it’s been comforting to speak to her when she is on shift. I just wish so very much I could hear her voice because I know everything would be okay then. I have surgery tomorrow and again on Thursday and I know she will be there the whole time, maybe not in the way I really want but I know she will be looking after me :heart:

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Hi, thank you for your message & yeah my sister has been messaging frequently and sending me videos of my nieces to cheer me up and I facetime my dad and boyfriend every day too. Although my mum isn’t physically here anymore I know she will be watching over me right now and I know she will stand no messing and make sure I’m out of here soon :heart:

Thats good that you are able to see your boyfriend and family on facetime it will help so your not so lonely im sure your mum is watching over you wishing you a speedy recovery take care xx

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