Dont know where to begin just need to write my feelings out as I feel in such pain. I lost my beautiful mother last Monday after a long time in and out of hospital. The last month especially was very traumatic for her, crying and wanting to be in her own home. She knew her time was coming and was so upset to be stuck there. I live abroad but spent a month with her over March and April building her back up again for her next op. We had a wonderful time but inevitably I had to leave for home again. My guilt now is overwhelming me, I should have come back and looked after her in her own home, as it was when I arrived she was already unconscious and passed two days later. The fact is I did not do enough, I have 3 other siblings here, but I feel so many regrets. How do I get passed this I miss her so deeply.
Hi @Jane66
I’m so sorry for the loss of your beautiful mum 
Feeling guilty is normal but you sound like you really supported your mum, you did more than enough for your mum. Please be kind to yourself, your mum loves you and appreciated all that you did for her. She’s your guardian angel now and will watch over you, sending you love and strength. 
Xx
Hi @Katyh thank you so much for taking the time to reply I know I did a lot for her but us it ever enough? I guess its still early days
And these are all parts of the process. I will try to be more posiitve, thanks again 
We all think of the what ifs it awful. It is early days and you will start to feel the love more and cherish memories rather than feel the guilt. Bless you,.it’s bloody hard loosing our loved ones 
x
I guess its just human nature to blame ourselves and think if only, the difference with death is there is no second chances. I do not feel her around me which is hard too xx
@Jane66
It is human nature! I believe that if you are deep in the depths of grief our loved ones struggle to connect, also when they first pass they have to go through their own process before they can give us signs. It all depends how old their soul is. For example if they have an an old soul they can go through the process quicker as they have done so many times before.
Try asking your mum for a specific sign x
You have had a lot of experience I believe of these things I hope you are recovering slowly. Mum will come to me im sure when she is ready, she has a lot of people to catch up with there. I ask for a sign every day I guess I need some patience x
Yes your mum will be catching up with loads of passed loved ones, bless her. I’ll not go on but time is different in their realm. For example a week for us will be like an hour for them…so they really don’t have any concept of time. Sometimes it’ll feel like forever waiting for a sign, she’s not forgotten about you, she will come to you when she’s ready.
I’m hanging in there