My mum was in intensive care over Christmas, she has advanced Ms and now been diagnosed with type 2 respiratory failure. She has 3 daughters me being the oldest and I am now her next of kin. She only weighs 6 stone now but eats small amounts and drinks but her memory has gone abit strange. The hospital said she’s palliative care now even tho she doesn’t seem like she’s dying.
What have I got to expect? I’m so confused
Thanks x
Hi @NatalieZara1992, I’m so sorry to hear about your mum’s diagnosis, and that she is now getting palliative care. Palliative care is care that aims to treat symptoms and improve quality of life when the illness is advanced and can’t be cured, but it does not mean the same as end of life care. Your mum’s medical team would be the best people to ask about how long they think she might have and what to expect, if this is something you want to know - although this would only be an estimate and these things can be unpredictable.
It’s important to be kind to yourself and find outlets for your emotions. Keep posting here if you find that it helps. Some of our users will have been in similar situations and will understand some of what you are feeling.
We have some information on our website about What to Expect at the End of Life, How to Support Someone at the End of Life, and Coping as a Carer which you might wish to take a look at.
If you need to talk to someone one-on-one for information or emotional support, you could contact the MS Society Helpline (0808 800 8000 or helpline@mssociety.org.uk) Marie Curie (0800 090 2309 or book a call)
Hello NatalieZara. I’m sorry for your suffering and also for your mum’s. My understanding of palliative care is that it’s not only for the terminally ill. Eighteen months ago my sister was diagnosed with bowel cancer. Unfortunately she had a bad reaction to chemotherapy and ended up in hospital, very poorly indeed. She was put on palliative care. I must admit I panicked, thinking it was end of life care. I spoke with the nurses and they reassured me that wasn’t the case. I’m no expert so if I was you I would have a chat with the medical team. Sending love and hugs to you, your mum and family. Xx
Dear Kate,
I hope that your sister recovered.
Love
MaryL x x x
Fortunately Mary, my sister has fully recovered, thank you. 