Planning for Adminstration Services as a Result of my Parner's unexpected Death

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Since the sudden, unexpected death of my husband, I feel myself increasingly anxious about dealing with my estate on the event of my death. My husband was younger than me and I didn’t expect to outlive him or have to arrange my own funeral and legal affairs. I don’t want to appoint an executor from my family or friends and would prefer this to be done by a third party. Does anyone have any similar experience or advice of how to arrange this?

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Hello @MissingEsCanar,

I’m part of the Online Community team, and I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about the sudden death of your husband. I can only imagine how difficult this time must be for you, and I want you to know that many of our community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one, so they will understand some of what you are going through.

It’s completely understandable to have concerns about your estate and legal affairs after the death of a partner. While each experience is unique, I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support and advice. In the meantime, you might find these Sue Ryder resources helpful:

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,
Ben

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Hi, I also lost my partner who was 9 years younger than me and just like you I thought that I’d have gone first so I know exactly how you feel. I don’t know how far you have gone with you plans but I’m sure that you can make a solicitor your executor.

I’m lucky enough to have a brother who is going to act as my executor, but I’ve already paid for a plot next to my partner so that helped me cope with some of the grief and maybe if you can do the same it will help you also.

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Dear Marchon,

Many thanks for your reply. I have some family and friends I could request as executors but I would rather keep the whole process simple and less personal. I always expected my husband would take care of the details which would have been perfect.

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Well if you’re feeling anxious about it try and speak to a solicitor or how about Citizens Advice in the first instance just to set your mind at rest? It’s such a stressful time so try and take things step by step and most importantly leave time for You.
If you need to vent just do it on here - we are all in the same boat and know to a lesser or greater extent exactly what you are going through. Just remember that you are not alone. Best wishes.

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Hi

My incredible and amazing husband of 33 years died totally unexpectedly three weeks ago. I can’t describe the agony and pain, but as your on here I’m pretty sure you felt and feel the same.

My Mum died two weeks before him. It’s been beyond terrible.

So I’m administering two estates at the same time as I was the Executor for both. There is so much to do but at least it keeps me busy.

I feel the same way as you: being an Executor is really demanding and as my estate is complex my Executors will have a lot to do. I don’t want to burden them.

I’m currently updating my Will and have appointed three Executors: my two best friends and my Solicitor. The Solicitor will do all the work when I’ve died but my friends remain control but will have to do very little. They will decide who gets what possessions from my home (I’ve given then a wish list of things I think people want) but then the Solicitor’s firm will apply for and manage probate, sell the remaining contents, sell the home, pay IHT, liquidate my pensions, and then share the residual money out after they’ve taken their fee.

Hope this helps a little.

J

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Many thanks Jamie. Your advice about a solicitor doing the heavy lifting is exactly the route I shall take to avoid any further hassle or responsibility for family and friends.

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