We had the funeral yesterday which I was dreading. It went as well as it could. Having mum near me again was comforting but of course the service and finality of it was very hard. Seeing her friends and love for her also brought some comfort. Yet when I got home the sadness fully hit. Mum is now physically gone and that has hit me hard. I feel that all the funeral prep and knowing mum was physically somewhere the last few weeks has kept it more manageable. Now there is no escaping she has gone 
I saw a counsellor the other day who described the mum shape hole that I’ll always have. She said at the moment my life is very small around it and it is everything. However over a long time my life will grow around it. I feel changed and I’m now living a completely different life to 3 weeks ago.
I’m glad it went as well as it could, @s.b.2025 - well done on getting through it. This kind of comedown after all the busy-ness of funeral prep is really normal, and you’re not alone, Please do keep reaching out for support 
Hi
Thank you for your post. Taking each day at a time, that’s so important even though it’s so tough getting through the days.
I like what your therapist said: at the moment your life is very small around your loss and it is everything. However over a long time your life will grow around it. I’m hoping for this for me after losing my mother 6 weeks ago - each day is another day to get through. I keep looking at the hoover but that’s as far as it gets and I’m exhausted all the time.
I’m sorry for your loss and that you are also living this hell. I am currently signed off work but don’t achieve a great deal each day. I’m too weary to attempt much right now.