Preparing for loss of a child

I feel unsure & unqualified to message here but my 12 year old nephew is now unable to receive the medical intervention he requires to live (he is disabled) , we don’t know if he has days, weeks or months. We are so very sad. His mum is my sister & he is her only child. I’m terrified I will lose her too. I’m desperate to know if there is anything I can do to prepare/help her survive her immenent loss.

Hello Sandy5,

Please don’t feel unsure, or unqualified to post on the community. Everyone here never wanted to be qualified for this site, but I’m confident they are quite sure the site offers them some comfort in their grief.

How very, very sad for your Nephew, it must break your heart to see both him, and his Mum, your Sister, in this tragic situation. My heart goes out to all of you.

I’m hearing how painful this is all feeling and I want you to know that you’re not alone. There’s always someone out there to help you through this.

The following two links are specific in Child Bereavement. You could contact them immediately on behalf of your Sister. They will also be invaluable later on.

● Child Bereavement UK - supports families with the loss of a child. Also supports bereaved children. 0800 02 888 40

● The Compassionate Friends - for families who have lost a child of any age. 0345 123 2304

I can see you believe your Sister will need help, coping with the loss of her Son, quite understandably you are concerned for her welfare.

Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here:

If you find your Sister is in a desperate situation, and needs immediate help, please contact any of the following links:

Samaritans ( are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.

Shout ( are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text SHOUT to 85258 and talk to them about anything.

You can also find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline (

If you are worried your Sister is in danger of harming herself, please call 999 or contact her GP for an emergency appointment immediately.

Keep on posting Sandy5, we are always here for you. You need to keep strong for your Nephew and Sister in the immediate future, but you may also need help in coping. Our lovely members will respond to you, and some may have been on the same path, as you face now.

I hope some of what I have given will help you. I suggest you write down the links and phone numbers of the immediate helplines, keep it at hand, as you will also be grieving and may not be focused enough to remember where you have put them.

Our thoughts are with you, take care,
Online Community Team

Thank you so much. I was so apprehensive about posting on here but you’ve made me feel very supported. You do a fab job. I hope you know how appreciated you are x

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