My brother died 6 weeks ago, and im struggling to manage.
I try so hard to be strong for my parents , but since his death i find myself not talking to them about things to try and protect them, but by bottling things up I know im hurting myself. I dont feel i have anyone i can talk to, if i talk to my partner he just speaks to my parents , which defys the point .
My brothers death was a little unusual in that he died abroad, so we have to to wait around a month to find out the cause of death. Its heen very difficult to communicate with authorities abroad, and because of the time difference we got a little muddled with what actually happened. He was admitted to hospital a few weeks before his death, with what he led us to believe was one health issue , but sincd his death ive found out he actually had a heart attack. He never told us this, i believe because he wanted to go on the trip he had planned and he knew wed stop him if we knew. I havent shared this information with my parents as i know theyd blame themselves for not stopping him going if they knew the truth.
Also, we were intially led to believe his passing was proably quick ( he was travlleing alone and when he was found it was already too late) but since being given the confirmed cause of death ive been doing some research and it was actually a horribly painful way to go. I dont want to break my parents heart by sharing thiswith them but i also wish now i didnt know and couldve taken some comfort in thinking he didnt suffer alone.
