Almost 16months since that awful day, I’m sat unmotivated asking myself what my daily purpose is!

I’m there if family ask for anything or friends.
I’m there if there’s an invite to do something.

But what’s my daily purpose in life?
I’m retired and don’t want to go back to work and although I’ve thought about volunteering I’m not wanting to do that!

I sometimes think I’m just too sad to put myself on people, friends or loved ones!
I have wondered support but what’s my daily purpose without him?
I try to keep busy, I tell people I’m doing this or that but today my brains taken over!

I try to distract myself by starting to do something but it’s not working very well today.


Thanks for sharing this with us - I think a lot of our members will identify with your post, @Palmart. I’m just giving your thread a gentle bump for you :blue_heart:

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Exactly how I feel at the moment …I just think is this my life from now on and I hate it

Hi @Palmart,

Come January it will be two years since my lovely Christine died. I have found this second year immensely more difficult to endure than the first. Christine and I both took early retirement.

I understand what you are saying. I did think about returning to work but in all honesty I don’t think I could put up with the bull shit and kowtowing anymore. I have done some volunteering but it was very erratic as on the days when I am feeling intense sadness I am not fit for anything. So I don’t really make any commitments to anything at the moment unless it is easy for me to renege.

As to my purpose now? Like you I am completely unclear at the moment. I hope that some sense of this will begin to emerge. But I am also content that for the time being at least, it’s ok to be purposeless with nothing beyond just getting through the really awful days as best as I can.

Yes, distractions can help but like you they sometimes simply don’t work.

Best wishes to you.

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I’m glad I’m not the only one that feels like this
I am so loss now even after 5 years without my husband
My purpose in life was my husband
Like you said friends family I see I try to keep myself busy
But what is it really all for
The love of my life is not here to share all this with
I keep telling myself and others who have loss loved ones try and enjoy life
They would want you too
But unfortunately it’s not that easy
I do hope you all eventually find a purpose in life without our loved ones
Take care xx


Thank you for understanding, mostly I try to take one day at a time which means I don’t usually plan to far ahead or I just go with the flow but some days I just hide away

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Exactly, I don’t always know who I am let alone how my future looks

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Each day is hard without him to share it with. I know we have to take small steps but sometimes I feel I’m going backwards

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