Recently bereaved through alcohol

Hi
My partner passed away 9 weeks ago tomorow from alcohol related liver disease i had no idea how much he was consuming until he admitted the problem the begining of the year but ended up in hosp for 7 weeks he came home for nearly 3 months but sadly deterioated and ended up back in again never came home he was just 42 and leaves me and our 11 year old daughter

This year has been a rollercoaster of emotions the lies the hurt but at the same time not wanting to lose him as i loved him and what hurts so much is he wanted the help and to get better and he didnt.

Anyone else been through this as i would love to chat to people in my situation as i am struggling coming to terms with everything.

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Hello, I am so sorry for your loss. I am not in the same situation as you, but I have lost a friend and someone else I knew to alcoholism. The friend was 29, he had been in and out of hospital with liver problems, in the end he died in his sleep because he accidentally had too much alcohol with his antidepressants, and the other was my landlady’s boyfriend, he was 40, his family did not know just how much he drank, like my friend he hid it from his family, and one day he was found unconscious and he died a few days later.

It’s very very difficult when you lose someone to alcoholism, you always think that you could have done more, but I don’t really think you can, it isn’t anyone’s fault, it’s an illness, and sadly there still isn’t enough help for these people, it must be so difficult for you, I hope you can find people here who you can relate with, also, Sue Ryder also provide free online counselling, if that is something you think might benefir you.

Thank you sorry yo hear you know people that have gone the same way i think alot of people do dont they
It is hard it is an illness but i find that until they admit themselves you are powerless i wish he had got help sooner especially for our 11 year old but he would have been in denial then so difficult

Fg15 first sorry for loss I work in addictions and unfortunately have had clients pass away due to alcohol liver disease there is nothing any one can do till a person says they want help I lost my partner unexpectedly last November to lung cancer he was 55 and did not know he had cancer I was always begging him to stop smoking a couple of days before his gp had a go at him for this you always think could I have done more thoughts with you

Thank you
So hars because i knew he was better than that and look out when we first got together but the alcohol became an addiction and he couldnt stop til it was too late i am truly heartbroken forever

No words I can say will help I’m still just taking each day as it comes when you are ready perhaps look for somewhere who work with family’s of addiction there. Will be people who have gone thorough the same as yourself

Thank you and sorry for your loss too

It’s just so sad, we need better mental health servives for alcohol addiction, because family alone cannot help, how is your daughter coping, does she have any help from counsellors? Do you?

I know ita a horrible thing and happening more and more my daughter is doing quite well she dosent cry but will talk about dad now and again so thats good i have been in contact with winstons wiah for her

Dear Fg15,
i am really sorry for your partner but its not your faul so please dont feel guilty. the alcohol needs to blame and the drinker as sometime they well know what it can cause . its a worst habit and i belived it should be controlled with strict measuremenat as it ruin people’s lives. this month my brother has passed away. he was drinking with friend and then while driving home he drowned with his car. it was awful. he was the kindest brother he would help even his enemy if they need help. he would not normally drink but after lockdown was removed he thought its to catch up with his friend and way home this happened. alcohol has taken my young brother’s life too. you are no way at fault .

Oh my goodness so sorry
Thing is with my partner when he came out of hosp for 3 months i did ask questions such as why he didnt know boredom his body just needed more i asked have you always been an alcoholic all the time i have known you he shook his head and said no he wasnt a bad person not violent and didnt apppear drunk with it because he was so immune to it he was scared when he went back in hosp (he didnt drink in the 3 months he was home he just deterioated i know he didnt want to be an alcoholic but i am hurt he has left us this way and wanted the help but was too late but i am glad he admitted the problem

i am so sorry. he tried to help himself but years of abuse has already taken effect . no one is born alcoholic. its start with something like antedepressant. it makes you feel good for while so whenever the some bad memories triggers people think driking can be remedy so they use it like antedepressant and by the time body get so much immune to alcohol that they want more and more. most alcoholics are in deniel that they have habit . if you family thinks that you have a problem that s the best guide. alcohol user can not see that they have problems. if anymore lives are lost please do something about it dont ignore if you partner have problem

I know been a rollercoaster of emotions as feb he went in hosp for 7 weeks they gave him 50/50 i was lucky to get him home in march for 3 months but sadly wasnt to be he has broken me forever

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