Regrets

Coping with bereavement
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I have so many regrets it is tearing me apart. My best friend (male) of 9 years died 2 months ago. I miss him so much. When he was alive I took his love for granted , would never accept his marriage proposals, just enjoyed knowing he loved me completely. It’s only now he’s gone that I realise what I had, now it’s too late.

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Hello Mikey47,

I can see that you’re new to the community, so I wanted to say that I am so sorry for the loss of your best friend that brings you here.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that may help you right now.

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@Mikey47 I understand where you are coming from. I lost my husband suddenly at Christmas. Went to work on the Saturday and Sunday I got a call from my son to say that dad had collapsed. Time I got home he was gone. He was 53 years old. Just celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. I hadn’t told my husband for ages that I love him and how I appreciate him. I thought I had years to tell him. I often played hard to get as love him chasing me. Now I will never get the chance to him. I hope he knew. I did make his sandwiches every day. I wrote everything down in a letter to my husband and put it in his coffin. Recently I wrote him another letter. I often what’s app him as well. I really miss my husband and feel so lonely without him. All our future plans and dreams have gone. Life is so unfair and cruel. I expect your partner knew that you loved him or you would of left him if you were not happy with him. Take care of yourself Xx

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Thank you so much Hazel 1966. I also am sure your husband knew you loved him. Some people find it easier to say than others. My friend was 75, and had so many health problems I don’t know how he coped. But every day he told me he loved me, complimented me, and said how much he appreciated me. How can one person be like that towards someone so non committal. I know I sound self centred and selfish, but how I wish for another day or even an hour to say what I should have said when he needed to hear it. God bless you, and give you peace of mind

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Hi @Mikey47 thank you for your reply. My counselor said actions speak louder than words. You sounded like you were there for him when he was poorly. Lucky to have you.
Take care my lovely xx

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Yes, I was there for him always, but very seldom told him I loved him. I’ve heard that saying before, but never actually connected it to my situation. It has given me some comfort, so thank you. Take care of yourself, one day at a time xx

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